Page 22 of Discovering Grace

Of course, he did not feel as she did. He hated that she and Hope had lied, and he would much rather have her sister riding with him.

It would not matter if anyone else admitted to preferring Hope’s company to Grace’s. But why could Jacob not see or understand how wrong Hope was for him? She would never be content to live at the vicarage by the sea. The horizon beckoned her to explore each day with a vivacity few could keep up with, and even fewer understand. Hope’s heart had wings, and Jacob’s had an anchor keeping him safely at harbor. Jacob, always steady and sure, loved the people who would soon be under his care. For him, the sunset wasn’t to be chased, but admired after a long day’s honest toil.

Grace sighed as she drew up beside him. “Good morning, Jacob.”

He nodded deeply to her, as solemn as if greeting a stranger. “Good morning, Grace.”

Her shoulders slumped and she gripped the reins tighter in her hands. “If it is uncomfortable to be near me, we can forget about the ride. I have no wish to upset you any more than I already have.”

“Oh, Grace. It isn’t that.” He blew out a frustrated breath. “Not entirely that. You are my friend, and even if I do not condone your actions, I understand them.” He turned his horse around. “Come, let us ride while we talk. The horses need the exercise.”

“I am not certain I wish to talk.” Grace followed, staying near without drawing alongside him. “I have the feeling it will be more of a lecture.”

Jacob snorted and craned his neck to peer over his shoulder at her. “That sounded remarkably like Hope.”

Grace smiled despite herself. “I have had a few days of practice. And it is not surprising she resents your lectures; she receives them quite often.”

He pulled up, forcing her to come nearer before he spoke again. “She thinks I lecture her too much?”

“Jacob.” Grace studied the way his eyebrows were drawn down, wishing she could reach over the distance between them to smooth them out. Must he appear so disapproving? “You do lecture her. Often of late.” She moved her horse forward again and he followed suit, staying parallel to her on the road.

Silence hung between them, the gentleman’s head lowered. “I suppose I can be pompous.”

“I’m not certain I would call it that.” Grace held the reins lightly again, trying to give her attention to horse and road. Even with Hope physically absent, she managed to be present in thought. It took a great deal of restraint to avoid sighing over that fact. “You always mean well. But you sound very much like our father. He is forever reminding her to do or be different than she wishes.”

Jacob’s head turned in her direction, his horse moving closer. “Have I done that? It wasn’t my intention. I always admired her more spirited ways. I meant to help her see what others expected.”

As someone who had witnessed the lectures in question, Grace doubted he even understood how his words sounded to Hope. Though she knew he had not meant to stifle her sister, he certainly had made it clear he objected to Hope’s actions a time or two. Yet even after voicing his disapproval, he stared after Hope, watched her every movement, admiring her.

“I understand, Jacob.” Grace turned her horse onto a path off the road, one the three of them had frequently followed on their rides together. The horses knew the trail well.

“Thinking on it, I suppose I spoke more often than my place allowed. A friend should censure less.” Jacob ducked to avoid a low-hanging branch that she had but to tip her head forward to pass. He was not an astoundingly tall man. Not like Silas or Isaac. But he carried himself with a confidence that made him seem larger than he was. He glanced at her, tilting his head to the side. “Do you ever take issue with your sister’s behavior? I cannot recall you speaking ill of her.”

“She is my sister.” Grace offered him the barest shrug. “I have cautioned her at times, but it is not for me to tell her how to act. She does not always consider the consequences to what she does. But there is no one who would come to a friend’s aid faster than Hope. I have never wanted to curb her liveliness.”

Jacob turned his attention back to the road, his expression unreadable. “Even if most of society regards her liveliness as ill-mannered?”

“Why have we any worries over society? We are not often away from home, and here, people know and care for us.”

“But what of the future, when you are gone from home?” Jacob asked, then his jaw tightened.

Grace knew the conversation had turned to something of a more delicate matter. Something she did not entirely wish to discuss with Jacob. It would hurt, if he said too much. The man had absolutely no idea how much it pained her to know how her feelings were overlooked.

“You speak of marriage,” she said, watching him carefully.

Jacob’s eyes darkened and he pulled his horse slightly away from her. “Yes.”

Grace stiffened her spine. If he wanted to take this path in their conversation, then she would say exactly what he needed to hear, even if it was not what she most wished he knew.

“Hope and I have always agreed on one thing. We will not marry where there is not love. If a man truly loves Hope, he will see her for all her strengths and weaknesses, and not wish to change her. He will love her as she is.” She adjusted her grip on the reins. “And I pray I find the same.” Then she gave her horse a nudge, urging the animal into a faster pace.

Let him think on what she said and put together his response with care. How could he think himself in love with Hope when he saw fault when she acted in the way most natural to her? Hope could behave better, and the same might be said for most people, but nothing in her character posed any true moral difficulties.

At length, Jacob’s horse drew even with hers again, matching her pace. He did not attempt conversation, riding at her side. Ignoring him, Grace tipped her head and leaned over her mare, enjoying the wind.

“To the beach?” Jacob shouted. A few miles away, it would make their ride long.

Grace almost cheered at the suggestion. “Yes, of course.” They talked no more, but their horses raced along the paths that would take them to the shore faster than the road itself. Here they cut through the property of neighbors and friends, all the way to the Inglewood estate.