Page 64 of An Engagement with the Enemy

He chuckled. “A pebble. The tiniest of pebbles.”

“I had barely closed my window.”

“Had you? It seems my timing was perfect.” She stood so close. It would be an easy matter to forget words entirely and simply show her exactly how he felt. Yet she deserved all of the words he had at his disposal. Too bad they disappeared from his head the moment she stood near him. Best to take what few he had left and make a try for a confession.

“I came to tell you I’m in love with you. You always seem to know what I’m going to say before I say it, though. Besting me so often in our arguments. But in case you didn’t realize it, I thought I had better make the matter clear. Even if you don’t wish to marry, yet. I’d like to try to talk you into it. Eventually. My heart is yours, completely, if you will have it.”

She gazed up at him, lips parted in surprise. Only his name escaped her in a whispered gasp. “James.”

He pressed on. “I love you. I have for ages. Even before I loved you, or knew that I did, I thought you beautiful. Intelligent. Witty. Every good thing that you are, I admired it and wanted to tell you. My stupid pride kept me from saying a thing. I couldn’t admit that you were wonderful, because I was afraid it meant you had bested me. And if you bested me, why would you ever want to draw swords with me again, my dearest enemy?”

“But you’re my only enemy,” she said, tears glistened in her eyes. Then she winced and laughed. “Oh, that came out all wrong.”

He chuckled and drew her hands closer, resting them against his chest. “Then I surrender, Jess. Fully and completely. Everything I am, I surrender it to you. My heart is yours. My future is yours. Everything,” he whispered again. “I lay it at your feet. And beg you to give me a chance, to prove I can be the husband you deserve. Someday.”

The hard pebbles and soft grass crunched gently under her feet as she drew closer. James was keenly aware of each rustle of fabric and leaves, every quiet sound magnified in the intimate hush of the garden.

Jessica’s eyes stayed on his. “What about my weaknesses, James?” she asked in a whisper. “Hysterics. Fits. Whatever you call them. They will not simply stop because you love me.” He saw pain in her expression. And yearning.

He squeezed her hands. “If I could take them from you, I would. Only to make you happier and more at ease in the world. Yet they are part of who you are.” He saw the hope in her eyes dim and he spoke with greater urgency. “I love you completely, every part of you, with my whole heart. Not in spite of your tender spirit, but because of it. You have a strength in you, a resilience that outshines any social unease. You will never face those trials alone again if you will let me be by your side. I will hold your hand when you need encouragement. I will spirit you away when you need the quiet. I will be a shield, a support, whatever you need. If you will let me.”

As James gazed down at Jessica, he noticed how the moonlight made her skin glow like marble, her eyes luminous dark pools that reflected the glittering stars overhead. He raised a hand to cradle her delicate face, brushing his thumb over the soft curve of her cheek.

Her smile appeared, tremulous but warm. “I cannot bear to be a burden to you, James.”

“Burden?” he repeated, incredulously. “I will expect equal support, you know. Your struggles will be mine, and mine will be yours. Who knows my faults better than you do? I have no doubt you could go on and live a full, happy life without me. But I cannot say the same of myself. Let me try, at least give me a chance, to prove myself worthy of your trust and your love.”

Jessica leaned into his touch, her rapid breath warm against his palm. He felt her quickened pulse beneath his fingertips. Her lips parted slightly in anticipation, and James’s heart raced at her closeness. She hesitated only a moment before whispering, “You have them both. I love you, James.”

Joy surged through James at her words. He bent closer, searching her eyes. “You mean it? Even though you’ve said you didn’t want a husband—”

She placed her fingers on his lips, silencing him with the gentle touch. “I was terrified,” she whispered. “What man would want me, knowing my faults? Knowing how broken I feel, I couldn’t imagine anyone looking past it. And you haven’t. You’ve accepted me instead. Helped me when you didn’t have to. I am so relieved.” Her eyes glimmered with tears, and he ached to soothe them away.

For the rest of his life, he’d dry her tears, hold her, calm her fears, and—more importantly—rejoice in all her accomplishments and triumphs. He swallowed back his emotion as best he could before speaking.

“I don’t want to waste any more time, you know.”

“You’ve always been very impatient,” she agreed with a smug smile. “I admit, I feel the same.”

“Then you will make me the happiest of men and consent to be my wife?”

Jessica smiled up at him with unconcealed love in her gaze. “Yes.”

When their lips met at last, James sighed into the tender kiss, the floral scents and sounds of night enveloping them. He wanted to lose himself forever in this exquisite moment with his beloved. All his doubts vanished, and he would take whatever time she needed—despite his talk of impatience—to reassure her own.

As long as they were together, nothing else mattered.

EPILOGUE

The rest of summer passed pleasantly, each day bringing with it something Jessica looked forward to. The third and final day of the fair came and went in a blur. Jessica came only to sample treats in the morning, rested, and then went back that evening to sit with James and Catherine for the play. She laughed along with them at the antics of the characters and Puck, running about a forest and unable to tell each other how they felt.

A week later, she bid her cousins, uncle, and aunt farewell as they departed for their home north of York, bracing herself for the reactions that were sure to come when news spread of her and James’s imminent courtship.

She had confided everything to Catherine the day after the conversation with James, his beautiful promises, her acceptance of his proposal. Though still concerned for them both, Catherine had vowed to stand by Jessica no matter what came.

“All I want is your happiness, dearest one,” she’d said, embracing Jessica tightly. “If James is who you truly want, then I will be there to support you. Both of you.”

James had also spoken earnestly to Catherine, assuring her he would care for Jessica and help shield her from anything that distressed her.