Page 122 of Knot Their Soldier: Part Three

"This," I say. "I need this."

Halley’s arms come around me.

She doesn’t tell me it will be okay. She knows better than that, and I love her for it. Her fingers slide into my hair again, then settle at my temple, working slow circles against the ache behind my eyes.

The pressure in my skull begins to loosen.

I exhale against her stomach, and she makes a small, pleased sound above me. Then her purr starts, and it vibrates through my chest. My shoulders drop and my grip on her waist gentles. While the ugly math for the war council is still there, it's no longer clawing at the front of my thoughts.

Halley keeps purring until my breathing settles into the same slow rhythm as hers.

When the sound fades, the room rushes back in around us. Screens hum, radios crackle, and somewhere behind us, a soldier murmurs into a headset.

Her fingers go still at my temple. "There you are," she says softly.

I turn my face and press a kiss to her shirt. "Did I go somewhere?"

"A little."

Guilt tightens beneath my ribs. "I’m sorry."

Halley slides her hand down to my cheek and tilts my face back until I’m looking at her. "Don’t apologize for needing me."

I rest my chin against her stomach, my hands loose at her hips while her purple eyes search mine. She sees too much, as always, but I’m too tired to hide properly.

"You’re scared," she says.

I draw in a slow breath. "The army is moving again, the files are worse than I hoped, and every answer I find leads back to you having to sacrifice more of yourself than I want you to."

Her expression shifts, but she doesn’t pull away.

"And Everlyn’s news?" she asks.

My grip tightens before I can stop it. "That too."

Halley bends and presses her mouth to my forehead. "Then talk to me, Shade. I'm your partner, your mate, and we share our problems because they're heavy to carry on our own."

Her words settle into me slowly.

Since she came back to us, I’ve been analyzing her new reactions with more caution than I wanted to admit. Halley died in Viper's arms and returned changed, steadier when she used to be unsure, and more certain in choices that once made her doubt herself. At first, that scared me. I kept waiting to discover death had taken some vital part of her and that the Halley I loved was gone for good.

I was wrong.

This is still Halley.

She still fusses over the people she loves, blushes when desire catches her off guard, and has a quiet stubbornness that I've always admired. Except now she doesn't bottle everything up until it explodes out of her. Some of her fights with Knox could have been resolved by clear communication when the problem first arose instead of her letting it simmer. She is braver now, and confronts issues directly.

Encouraged by her, I try to open up as well.

I press my cheek against her stomach and let the truth gather slowly, because this is Halley, and I owe her more than polished answers.

"I think I’d be a good dad," I say.

Her fingers still in my hair.

I almost regret saying it until her hand settles against my cheek.

"You would," she says. "You’d be wonderful."