Page 24 of Hard to Get

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Like, if you believe in fate, do you believe your future is already set? I don’t like that idea. Which means I have to take responsibility for my part in the team trainwreck.”

She tilts her head and asks softly, “Do you feel responsible?”

“Not entirely. But I have to admit I haven’t been motivated the last couple of years. It’s tough when all you do is lose. It starts to feel hopeless. Nobody feels like playing and we all just want to get the season over with.”

“Yeah, it must be hard. Especially if you’re competitive.”

One corner of my mouth lifts. “And I am.”

“I thought so. And…” She pauses. “It’s also hard in hockey because your individual stats get dragged down by your teammates who aren’t playing well.”

I consider that. I’ve never been a player obsessed with stats, but they do mean something. And I definitely haven’t been the worst player on the team, even though I’m not happy with my performance.

“I wasn’t really thinking about my own stats,” I admit. “Lately, they’ve just been depressing.”

She gives me a sympathetic look. “Yeah, I get that. But it can help you with your training and development. Stats can tell you your strengths and weaknesses⁠—”

“I think I know those.”

She dips her chin. “I’m sure you do. But if you’re interested in more targeted performance analysis, that’s what we help with. We also can help athletes manage physical stress and prevent injuries.”

“Hmmm.”

“Your coach also probably uses data to develop game plans and take on your opponents’ strategies.”

“I don’t know.” I make a face. “We have a new coach. They hired him over the summer, so we barely met him until training camp.”

“Right, I heard that. Marc Dupuis.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you think that’ll help with all the issues you have?”

I look at her and hesitate. “I probably shouldn’t talk about it.”

She nods. “I respect that.”

“Anyway. I was trying to figure out if it’s some kind of fate that we keep meeting up or is it just luck. I think it’s more than luck.”

“But you don’t like to think that your whole life is predetermined.”

“Exactly.”

“I wrote a paper in university about luck and hockey stats.”

“Whoa. Really?”

“Really.”

“What did you conclude?”

“Well… when someone doesn’t have control over the outcome, it’s luck. So in hockey, say a player wants to shoot the puck… his success depends not only on his own skills and decisions but also the skills of the defencemen and goaltender. Plus a bunch of other variables.”

“Okay. Yeah.”

“In hockey, there’s nothing that’s certain. Everything depends on variables, so we’re looking at weighted probabilities. You as a player can’t control outcomes—like, you can’t win the game all by yourself—but you can improve the odds of winning with your skill and decisions.”