Page 78 of Hard to Get

I nod glumly. “I’m not sure what I’m feeling for Stella. I like her a lot. A lot. But… it’s new.”

“I’m telling you, dating is hard these days,” Blake says. “It’s like an extreme sport for your self-esteem.”

“And how do you know that?” Alanna asks.

He rolls his eyes. “I hear it from single guys at work.”

Alanna frowns. “There are a lot of men out there who blame all their failures on women. They think when they get turned down, it’s a personal affront. They think they’re entitled to attention, affection and even sex from any woman they might want.”

“I don’t think it’s that bad,” I say, “but I like women.”

Alanna smiles. “I know you do.”

I love spending time with Stella. I feel like… I hope… she likes spending time with me, too.

Oh hell. It’s more than that. For me, anyway. I am rapidly becoming crazy about her. It’s possible I am literally losing my mind—fantasizing about her when I’m alone in hotel rooms, even when I’m on the ice practicing, which is stupid. I’m stupid for her. I want to buy her orchids and know all her favourite foods and sleep with her in my bed all night.

“She doesn’t need a man,” Alanna goes on. “But that’s good. Because if you’re in her life, you know she wants you in her life.”

Just what I said to the guys. It’s better to be wanted by a woman than needed by her. I think of what Stella’s told me about her mom. Stella’s not like that.

“If she’s that happy with her single life, she’s not going to give it up for a guy who holds the door open for her or pays for her coffee.”

“You know a lot about her.” I frown.

She laughs. “It’s not just her. It’s a lot of women these days.”

“And how do you know that?” Blake asks dryly.

She shoots him an amused look. “I have girlfriends who are still single.”

The affectionate look they share says they’re happily married. Partners. Friends. In love. I’m happy for them. And Blake is a good guy. So maybe Alanna does know what she’s talking about.

“Being single is actually pretty great,” Alanna says, then slides Blake another glance. “Not speaking personally.”

Blake grins.

“No one asking you every day what’s for dinner. The whole bed is for you. The toilet seat is always dry.” Her wistful tone has Blake’s grin sliding off his face.

“It just means a man has to improve a woman’s life, rather than make it worse, for him to be attractive to her.” She shakes her head. “A lot of men want another mother. Not you, honey.”

That’s exactly what Stella said about the asswipe she lived with.

I know I’m not like that. And I don’t think I make Stella’s life worse. We have such great chemistry and connection; I don’t think I’m the only one feeling it. I’m willing to keep things casual and see what happens. But I see what Alanna’s saying. Stella does have a great life. And she’s happy in that life. She loves her career. She loves her friends. Her dog. Those damn orchids. Her ability to have whatever she wants for dinner. Spread out in her bed. Take a two-hour bubble bath whenever she wants.

How do I compete with that?

21

STELLA

The week has flown by. Things are busy at work, which is good. I don’t mind working long hours, but I do love going home to my cozy condo and my sweet puppy. I got my hair done, went to a Halloween party with friends, and went to Pilates class. But the highlight of my days has been texts from Jayden. I hear from him almost every day and each time I pick up my phone, I smile and get a little fluttery feeling low in my belly. He’s funny and a little dirty and it’s almost as much fun texting him as it is being with him.

Weirdly, I find myself looking for Jayden and Frank when we go to the park, even though I know he’s away.

Then it’s Tuesday and he’s back in Vancouver.

Jayden