Page 32 of Knox

“I didn’t,” Maddox says flatly. “I just shifted to a different kind of hell. I would’ve died in that stinky place even with helping the force out. I had been set up by the rival leader and the bastard that did the cutting. I would’ve been stabbed in the heart.”

“I’m sorry, Dean. You didn’t deserve any of that shit.” I realise what I’ve just said. “I mean, Maddox.”

“It’s weird hearing it again, but not really safe. Some of the gang members have been released from prison now. I doubt if they’re looking for a dead man. It’s better to stick to Maddox.”

“How do you cope? You must be constantly looking over your shoulder.” I can’t imagine having to live such a private life whilst out in the open. Another question I’ve been wondering about comes back to me. “How could you risk not being recognised when you fight.”

“I fought in really obscure places to begin with, working up the table by points. I don’t take on sponsors or endorsements. The thought of having my face plastered on energy drinks or sportswear… Yes, there’s a been a few cosmetic changes, the chin and cheek bones, the jawline and nose. I’ve been dying my hair for so long I forget what colour it really is. The laser surgery of the gang tattoo was the first step to changing. Then the horrible eye surgery, but even ten plus years later, I could be recognised.

“Apparently, gang members are like elephants: they never forget. Who’d’ve thought it.” His chuckle is bitter, and I feel for him, how lonely he must have been, unsure of any and every one who wanted friendship. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m not after your pity. I lived a quiet life. I had a job and that gave me friends. It wasn’t all doom and gloom.”

The knot of anxiety in my stomach is unusual. I’m confident, determined, and certain of who I am; with Maddox, I feel different. It’s protective. I want to keep him safe; I want him in my family, to know not just what he could’ve had, more like what he has now. He’s still Dean to me. I take a deep breath and notice that Maddox has stiffened, ready to turn and leave. I don’t want that.

“I’m sorry I was harsh. You’ve got to admit you threw a bloody great grenade at us. I want to get to know you again. I’d love it if you could come and meet my family. I know you’ve met Saint and Noah, and Drake, but he’s an enigma all to himself,” I laugh. “Come and see them all together with my parents. Roman is having his first official Sunday dinner this weekend. We’re moving in properly in the afternoon and will be using Saint’s truck for the big stuff. So maybe the next weekend.”

An idea pops into my head, and I smile. It’s the smile that has Roman horny in seconds. He moves in closer to me, resting his back to my front. He’ll be able to feel my hard-on if he grinds back. “Come to the club one night; we can introduce you to some of our friends. Maybe Ollie with be there.”

“Yeah, really. That would be cool. I haven’t had any fun like that in a very long time. What day is best for you?”

“Wednesday,” Roman and I say at the same time. I continue, “It’s a good night, lots of boys wanting some fun to break up the week.”

Maddox agrees, looking happier than he did a few minutes ago. “I’d better go; I hope we’re all on the same page. Friendship sounds good to me.”

“Come to the gym, we could have a workout together, maybe some sparring in the ring,” I challenge him.

“You’re on.”

We stand on the doorstep as Maddox gets in his car, and with a wave, he drives away.

Roman lets out a huge sigh. “That was intense. I thought he was going to walk out.” He turns to wrap his arms around my waist, squeezing before sliding his hands down to my butt, squeezing that too.

I kiss him softly. “Are you ready for bed, or we can talk though tonight?”

“We can do both and cuddled up sounds good to me.”

I make sure the door is locked, and we go upstairs, both quiet as we go through our nighttime routine. He pees while I brush my teeth and vice versa. With a final wash of my hands, I get undressed and mosey back to my, soon to be our, bedroom and the extra-large bed. Roman is sitting up, his back to the headboard; he looks like the bed was made for him to be in it. “God, I’m so glad I’ve got you. I wish we’d done it earlier. Would you have said yes to me a year ago, two years ago?”

“You can’t think like that. You’ve got to focus on now and what we have. Look forward, Knox, not back. We have each other now.” He’s quiet, and I think there’s something else he wants to say. I give him time. “He loves you; how do you feel about that?”

There it is, he’s being so open and honest. He deserves the same from me. “I don’t know. I loved him as my brother; I grieved for him as if he was blood. But that was Dean, not this, I don’t know—stranger.” Yes, he’s a stranger, but not really. It’s weird, because even though he looks different, he’s not. I don’t know what to think.

“Perhaps it’s better to treat him as a new friend. The last time you knew each other was bad. You were what…fourteen? Nobody’s the same as they were then.” Roman sighs. Then he shifts, and suddenly, he’s straddling my thighs, then leaning in to kiss me. “He wants us; you know that, don’t you? I don’t think that’s the only reason he wants to befriend us, but I saw the way he looked at us when we were with Jackson. And don’t forget the rather large tent he had in your office.”

Something stirs inside me, probably because Roman is grinding down on my knob. But also, because I love sharing Roman. I wonder if he and Ollie would like to play again; the last time was Roman fucking Ollie while I fucked the boy’s mouth. I wonder what the four of us could get up to.

“Whatever you’re thinking, the answer is yes.” Roman rises up on his knees, spits on my cock, and slides slowly down onto it.

“It will be great, baby. Pops will be so thrilled to meet you, and Dad knows you from the gym.” Knox sounds confident enough for both of us. I still have my doubts. They also knew Tate, and he caused a shit ton of trouble that put Noah in a dangerous situation.

“You say that so easily, but Tate caused a huge problem,” I bring my concern out in the open.

“That was a long time ago. Saint and Noah have no issue with you; I know you’re friends with Noah and Memphis. Come on before we’re dragged in.” He takes my hand and opens the front door with the other. “We’re here,” he calls out.

I wait, holding my breath at the sight of Robin. He’s one of the kindest, huge hearted men I’ve met; he’s smiling and opening his arms to hug Knox. Except, he doesn’t; it’s me he embraces. “Roman, I’m so happy to meet you. Thank you for making my boy so happy. He’s glowing.”

“Let him go, Pops. He needs to breathe. And, more importantly, where’s my hug? You know I’m the favourite son.” I hug the smaller man as he chuckles.

“All of them think they’re the favourite. Let’s eat, and you can tell me all about you, Roman,” Pops says enthusiastically. “We’re still waiting for Royal and Memphis, but they’ll only be a couple of minutes. I hope you’re hungry.”