Page 64 of Take Two

“What did you do?” he asks, leaning forward slightly, completely invested in my story now.

“I found other ways.” The memory brings a genuine smile to my face, the first one that’s felt completely unguarded since we started talking about this. “I auditioned for things whenever I could without them knowing. Community theater productions, student films, anything that would let me perform and explore what I actually wanted to do with my life.”

“And they never found out?” he asks, his eyebrows raised in a mixture of surprise and admiration.

“Not until I decided I wasn’t going to medical school.” The words carry the weight of that entire period of my life, the secret auditions, the careful scheduling, the constant fear of discovery.

The silence that follows is comfortable, contemplative rather than awkward.

“They were furious,” I continue, and this time when I laugh, it’s with the distance that comes from years of perspective. “Absolutely livid. I think my mother didn’t speak to me for three months.”

“I can imagine.”

“I think. . .” I pause, watching Jamie across the yard as he throws his arm around his father’s shoulders, both of them laughing at something I can’t hear from this distance. The easy affection between them is something I’m still learning to navigate in my own family relationships. “I think Julian gave me the courage to finally choose for myself. Watching him pursue what he loved, seeing him succeed on his own terms, it made me realize that disappointing our parents wasn’t the end of the world. Then, years later, we both came out, and that changed everything all over again.”

I smile, softer this time, thinking about how far we’ve all come. “Those two decisions, leaving medicine and coming out, completely transformed our family dynamic. Not overnight, and definitely not without consequences. Some of those consequences we’re still living with.”

“Worth it?” he asks, the question casual but the interest behind it genuine.

I don’t even have to think about the answer. “Every single second.”

Jacques nods slowly, processing everything I’ve shared with the seriousness it deserves.

“I think I’d rather disappoint someone else than spend the rest of my life disappointing myself.”

The simple truth of his words hits me harder than I expected, settling somewhere deep in my chest like a revelation I’m still learning to fully embrace. I’m apparently just full of realizations today.

“So would I.”

A familiar shadow falls across us before I have a chance to say anything else.

I look up to find Jamie smiling down at me, his youngest cousin still balanced comfortably against his hip.

Without a word, he leans down and presses a quick kiss against my forehead. His warm lips send a shiver moving quietly down my spine and I have to stop myself from tilting my chin up and demanding something more, something longer.

“You need anything?” Jamie asks, pulling back just far enough to look me over properly, his eyes moving across my face the way they always do, like he’s taking inventory.

I smile up at him. “Nope. I’m good.”

His eyes stay on mine for a beat longer than necessary, searching, unhurried, making sure the answer is real before he’s satisfied enough to accept it.

Only then does he glance toward his brother. “You been interrogating him?”

Jacques grins, wide and completely unrepentant. “I’ve been having a perfectly reasonable, genuinely illuminating conversation.”

“Sure you have.” Jamie cuts a flat look in his direction that carries absolutely no heat behind it whatsoever.

He rolls his eyes in the way that only older siblings truly can, all affection buried under theatrical exasperation, before carefully shifting his small cousin toward Jacques with the ease of someone who has done it a hundred times before.

“Your turn.”

Jacques laughs, low and easy, accepting her without a moment’s hesitation or complaint.

“C’mon, peanut.” He settles her securely against his hip, adjusting her weight until she’s comfortable, before nodding toward the house. “Let’s go find your mama.”

The little girl wraps both arms trustingly around his neck without so much as a murmur of protest as Jacques carries her back toward the noise and warmth of the gathering crowd, leaving Jamie standing quietly beside my chair in the space his brother just vacated.

He looks down at me again. Just that, nothing rushed about it.