Page 16 of Under Fire in Big Sky

At this point in her life, she didn’t think it was in the cards for her to be a mother. She thought she’d get married and build a rock-solid foundation before having kids. Like her parents.

Maybe if she’d found a way to end things with Eli and had moved on, she would’ve had that conventional structure. But whenever they were back in each other’s orbit they were drawn together, like gravity.

As she looked down at her stomach, only one thing mattered, the baby growing inside her. She needed this child to be healthy. Everything else was secondary.

“I’ll request a consult from OB-GYN,” Dr. Kelly said, “after I have a look on the ultrasound to be sure the pregnancy is viable.”

Viable.

Another cold medical term that made her uneasy.

Something the doctor said earlier registered. “When you spoke about discovering my pregnancy, you mentioned we realized. Does my friend Eli, Mr. Easton, know?”

“I was referring to some of the hospital staff. I’m not permitted to discuss the details of your condition with him, but I assured him I’d let him know once you woke up. Would you like me to get him for the ultrasound?”

Olivia wanted nothing more than to have him at her side, holding her hand, looking at an image of their baby for the first time. Together. But he made it clear when they first started seeing each other he didn’t want to ever get married again or have kids. “I don’t know.”

“Why don’t you think about it while I grab the machine.” The doctor offered another sympathetic smile before leaving.

Part of Olivia wanted to make sure the baby was okay before telling Eli. The other part of her was keenly aware that once he found out she was carrying his child, he would do the honorable thing.

Propose to her out of obligation.

Which was the last thing she wanted.

He was honest, reliable, loyal, a fantastic cook, and, most importantly, she’d never cared for anyone the way she did for him. Trusted him completely. Perfect husband material in her book, aside from the fact he didn’t want a wife or a kid or even a serious relationship.

In all the time they’d been together, he’d never spoken those three little words. I love you. Not once. So, neither had she. In fact, he always seemed prepared for her to end things instead of ready to take a step forward with her, toward something deeper and more permanent.

Dr. Kelly returned, wheeling the machine inside the room, and parked it next to the bed. “Have you decided?”

“There’s no need to get him. I’ll do it alone.” The same way she would raise this child. If he wanted to be involved in their lives, she’d welcome it, but she wasn’t going to force anything on him. Or accept a misguided proposal.

She needed to do the ultrasound, make sure the results were normal, and speak with a specialist—she was choosing to focus on a positive outcome. Afterward, she’d see him.

By then, Olivia hoped she would’ve figured out how to handle this situation with Eli.

Pacing in the examination room, Eli couldn’t sit still. He hauled the IV attached to his arm and the oxygen tank connected to the mask over his face from one end of the room to the other.

Until Liv woke up and Dr. Kelly gave her a clean bill of health, she wasn’t out of the woods yet. Far from it.

The list of bad things that could still happen churned in his mind. Respiratory issues. Organ damage. Heart attack. Stroke. Coma.

Olivia was the smartest, toughest, strongest person he knew, and she had almost died. Seeing that indomitable woman in danger, unconscious, looking so still, so…fragile, opened a floodgate of anxiety and fear inside him. Dredged up awful things from his past he wanted to forget.

Every person he ever loved had either been taken from him or had left him.

First, his father. Eli was only ten. On the night of a big storm, his parents had argued so loudly he heard them shouting over the thunder. His father complained about too many mouths to feed and too many bills to pay. The next day his dad was gone.

Then his mom got sick. Eli promised to be good, to be less trouble, to get a part-time job to pay for the medicine she needed. If only she stayed with him. He got straight A’s, didn’t make too much noise when she was resting, cleaned and cooked for her, and eventually convinced one of the ranch owners to hire him, mending fences and raking out stalls to bring in extra money.

None of it worked. She didn’t live to see his sixteenth

birthday.

Eli stopped pacing in the ER room, not wanting to think back on those days, forced to watch his mother wither away. Or how, after she was buried, he was dragged from Lubbock and carted off to live with his aunt and uncle in Corpus Christi. His mother’s sister was happy to take him in. Her husband on the other hand, who happened to be a cop, only saw him as a burden. As a distraction from their own children.

Still, his aunt showered him with affection and kindness. Eli did his best to make himself useful around the house, not to take away too much attention from his cousins, who were around his age, and to bring in money by working on a nearby ranch to cover the extra expenses he incurred.