Page 4 of Savage Pakhan

Physically, emotionally, mentally—he does it all.

I’m drained. He’s sucked the life from my soul and has imprisoned it within the bars of his own commands.

I watch the shadows under the door stop. He’s right there. Just outside. The only thing saving me is this door.

The knock startles me and I drop my mascara in the sink, leaving black lines in the white bowl. He’ll be so angry if he sees that. Snagging a tissue, I wipe the evidence of my mess away and toss the tissue in the toilet, flushing it so he thinks I’m going to the bathroom.

“Mia, I have to step out for a bit, but I’ll meet you at the bridal shower, okay?”

I grip the edge of the counter with my hands and hang my head. I’m relieved and furious. “You promise to be there? I won’t know anyone there, Ivan. I really need you there,” I say as quiet as I can.

The weaker I sound, the less likely I receive his abuse.

He slams his fist so hard on the door, the hinges shake and the wood cracks. “What did I just fucking say, Mia? I said I’d be there. This isn’t the wedding. You’d be fine without me. Papa will be there to take my place if I’m not there.”

“I’m not marrying him,” I say under my breath, but it’s loud enough for Ivan to hear.

I cover my mouth with the hand that has my ring on it. I stare in the mirror, wide-eyed, tears cascading down my cheeks. My heart pounds with fear. My bones shake. My mind screams at me to run, to get as far as I can before I’m captured.

At least, I can say I didn’t give up on myself.

He tries the handle, jiggling it in hopes the door opens. “Repeat that again, Mia,” he threatens.

I don’t move. I don’t say a word. My mind whirls to try and come up with a lie, something, anything to protect myself.

“I said he’ll be carrying the heavy gifts. He will be a lot of help.” I wipe the tears away, hoping it’s good enough for him to believe.

“That’s what I thought,” he sneers. “Don’t forget, Mia. You belong to me. I own you. Don’t even think about causing issues at the bridal shower or it will be the last thing you ever do. Do you understand me?”

I close my eyes and inhale, taking a deep breath to calm down so he doesn’t hear the emotion caught in my throat. “I understand, Sweetheart. I can’t wait to see you at the bridal shower.”

“I can’t wait to get this wedding over with. I can’t believe I have to go through all of this, and I don’t even get to have sex with you. I don’t see how this marriage is worth it.”

Another stab to the heart.

“Money and power,” he says to himself. “Not that your family knows anything about that, isn’t that right, Mia?”

I look away, staring at the tiled floor he had imported from Russia. The colors are bright and perfect for the house on the beach.

I’ve learned over the last few months, because Ivan likes to remind me of my place, that my family has taken a large financial hit with my father being under investigation from the Feds.

Things have slowed and the situation has put more pressure on this wedding. My father needs me to marry Ivan, or I could be the reason my family loses everything.

It’s funny how life always brings changes, even when those changes aren’t welcomed.

“You’re going to be late to your own bridal shower if you don’t hurry up. If I find out you’re a minute late, don’t bother coming home tonight. I’ll lock the door and you’ll sleep outside again.”

Again.

Like I could ever forget the first time.

The rain pours. The windshield wipers swipe back and forth at the highest speed, and it isn’t enough. I check the clock and panic twists my insides. I’m late on my curfew. Traffic is bumper to bumper. There’s an accident up ahead and no matter how many texts I send Ivan, he doesn’t reply.

Wedding dress shopping was a bust and a complete waste of time. I didn’t find one dress I liked, not that it matters what I like, I have to follow Ivan’s request on what he wants my dress to look like.

Strapless. Simple. Ballgown. No lace. No beading. No long train. No veil.

Everything opposite of what I want. I must have tried on fifty dresses today and they all looked the same. I hated every single one. I couldn’t bring myself to purchase anything which I knew would bring punishment when I got home, but now this?