Page 56 of Big Man on Campus

She frowns at Glory. “Can you tell me why the children were not in car or toddler booster seats?”

“Because it’s an Uber and he didn’t have any, but I thought he was supposed to and I didn’t know what else to do, how to get them home. Their parents were counting on me to get the home from day care and—”

“That’s enough, Glory.” I cut off her rambling, knowing the less said to a police officer, the better. I reach my arm around her, to hold her, and get her bag. My hand closes on the distinct shape of a small bottle. A nip.

The sucker punch to my gut makes me dizzy. Fuck no. She’s been drinking. Fucking drinking. Again. After she promised. Fuck. Letting go of her, I stand from where I was leaning on my totaled car. The Uber driver looks shaken but okay as he gives the other police officer his statement. I concentrate on breathing in air, steady, trying to keep the fear and panic from setting me off, turning all my churning emotions into anger.

Carrying a quietly sobbing Belle, Glory goes to where the EMT’s are strapping Beau onto the gurney and moving him to the ambulance.

“Hey honey, how are you doing? You’re so brave to not cry.” She smiles at him, and takes his hand. Her gentleness calms me, as if she’s talking to both me and Beau.

The EMT says, “You riding with him?”

“Yes,” she says, “and I’d like to take Belle with me.”

The lady police officer comes over. “No, Mam, you aren’t riding in the ambulance.” She turns to the EMT driver and says. “She’s not their mother.” Her words set off the tinder wood of my emotions, sparking my anger dangerously to the surface.

“Someone needs to go with them,” I say, trying hard to keep my voice even when I suddenly have an urge to yell at this lady, police officer or not. “We can’t wait for their parents to get here.” The EMT nods in agreement with me and the policewoman frowns, but nods at Glory who looks like she just found out she was cured of cancer. She launches herself at me for a hug, but it’s quick and clumsy and god help me, I try and smell her breath for alcohol, but I don’t have the chance. The ambulance drives off and I’m left with my car wreck and the wreck of a young man who used to drive for Uber.

I wait for the tow trucks with him while the ambulance disappears in the distance taking Glory away with it. I want to cry, but I hold my shit together because I’m not alone and I feel for this poor guy.

“Sorry about all this,” I say. He’s shaken enough to have tears of his own and I pat his back because he just lost his living.

“I hope the kid’s okay, you know? I shouldn’t have let her, shouldn’t have taken the kids, but what do I know about car seats or toddler seats or whatever the hell they are? I don’t have kids.”

I nod. I don’t know what to say. Glory knows all about them, knows she needed them. I have no idea what happened to cause the accident, but I know Beau should have been in a booster seat or strapped into a seat belt. I wish I could have heard her give her statement to the police, but I was too busy giving my own, too busy hearing the wise ass comment about how I’m running out of cars to wreck.

Once my car is towed, I get an Uber ride, ironically, to the hospital. It’s the last place I want to be, and the last person I want to see right now is Glory. Too many deja vous moments from three years ago cloud my mind, too much doubt about how damaged she is, worries me.

Chapter 18

Glory

At the hospital I pace around with Belle finally asleep in my arms. She cried, breaking my heart while they examined her, reaching for me, calling for me. I had to explain to the doctor that I’m not her mother, who she didn’t ask for. Not once. This worries me, but I push it aside because I don’t have any more room for worry in my heart right now.

Beau is being looked at and it seems like it’s taking forever though according to the giant sterile clock in the empty waiting area where I’m wearing a circular path in the tile floor, it’s only been ten minutes.

Kace arrives as the doctors come out and pronounce Beau in stable condition but they’re keeping him overnight for observation. Relief floods me and I check my phone. No response from the Perinis yet. The doctor tells me Beau is sleeping and I can’t see him yet.

When they leave, I go to Kace. I want to hug him, but I can’t put Belle down, so I kiss him. That’s when I notice there’s something wrong. He’s not smiling.

“I’m so glad you’re here. How’s Harold? The Uber driver?” I’d found out his name when he told the police. They said he’d be getting a fine, but I’m going to make sure I pay it for him.

“He’s upset. He’s out of a job.” Shock hits me.

“That’ right,” I say. “I didn’t even think of that.”

“You aren’t thinking about a lot of thing,” he says, his voice quiet, hovering between confusion and anger, maybe that’s what disappointment is. My gut churns and I tighten my hold on Belle, breathe in her little girl scent. I don’t know what to say to him. Because he’s right.

“Tell me what happened,” he says.

I tell him everything while we wait for the Perinis with Belle sleeping in my arms. About Madelyn Fontaine taking my place on the dance team, about the call from Mrs. Perini and taking the shuttle bus there and then forgetting to get the wagon and then calling the Uber for a ride. Then I tell him about Beau snapping his seat belt loose because he was excited that Kace was coming to the rescue. Overcoming the gripping revulsion and horror, I replay the scene inside our car in excruciating detail for Kace. When I finish, I shudder and take another deep breath of Belle’s scent to remind myself that I’m whole, that we’re all whole.

Watching Kace’s face for his reaction, I’m confused by his distance.

“Were you drinking?”

Stunned by the question, it takes a second to register and then I rush my words.