Page 59 of Bad Man on Campus

“He’s doing fine, Kace.” I put my hand over his. Majik checked with the hospital for me because no one there would give me the time of day and she has a friend who works there.

“You’re right though. We—I got lucky with this one.” I heave a deep breath. “I wasn’t even driving this time, Kace. I thought it would be okay to drink and not drive, but I was wrong.” Tears seep, but I make a vicious swipe of my hand. It’s time I banish the self-pity. And the drinking.

“I think I can cut a deal with the prosecutor. Kace, your dad is working with them on your behalf. He has their respect,” the attorney says

Tim senior takes a deep breath. “Working something out with the St. Paul University officials is another matter. They don’t want to be seen as playing favorites to athletes, bending the rules because a student is an athlete seems to be a matter of contention on campus right now, so my son tells me.”

“Thanks to Madelyn Fontaine and the SADD group hyping it up.”

“It’s our fault too,” I say. “Or at least my fault.” I smile and put my hand on his knee under the table no matter how inappropriate it is because I need to touch him. Privately. “Because no matter how illegal it was for you to lie for me about the accident, Kace, I can’t hold it against you.”

“That’s the thing,” Tim senior says, you have a good story, a very compelling story, and if the truth of it were made as public as the ruckus about special treatment, it might take some of the stigma off the University officials for being lenient.

Shuddering at the thought of airing all the dirty laundry, I steel myself, gather up whatever courage I have, though I’m vibrating with fear and trepidation, and ask, “How much of the story would we need to share?”

“The whole nine yards. Everything you told us today. It made me weep and I’m a grown, hardened man. Students would identify and they would want you to have another chance.”

“It’s not me I’m worried about, Mr. Hill. I don’t want Kace to get thrown out. It would be a punishment too severe if he lost his senior year of hockey. He was heading to the NHL and he deserves his shot.”

“You deserve—”

“Whatever I get. I’ll deal. I already got a second shot by being here. SPU let me back in and I blew my second shot. Now.” I shrug. It’s not that I feel numb, because I don’t. A low hum of pain like a dentist drill in the next room, waiting for me, runs through every nerve in my body. I hiccup for no other reason except as an escape valve for those nerves.

“Glory, you deserve as many chances as it takes. What you’ve had to overcome is so big and so devastating,” Kace says, putting his hand over mind and squeezing. The conviction in his eyes makes me want to weep with joy. I want to throw myself in his arms and hold him and never let go, to tell him as long as he gives me another chance it doesn’t matter what the hell the court or the school does. He’s what matters most to me. That, and Beau Perini recovering fully.

“I agree with Kace on this,” Tim senior says.

The lawyer nods. “If I were on the jury, I’d be on your side, Ms. Rose.”

* * *

The bright part about the next week is going to AA with Majik. I almost wish we could go every night and I say so.

“I know how you feel. But the group isn’t meant to be a crutch, more like a help.”

I nod. I need to swim now that I’ve jumped into the deep end of the pool. I don’t know how long it’ll take, but I’ll need to keep going, to get stronger and stronger until it’s automatic, like breathing. Living without alcohol needs to become living. Period.

* * *

Dooley takes charge of the social media campaign after Kace and I talk to him and his friends and tell them the story. By the third time through, holding his hand, feeling him solid and strong next to me, it gets easier. He shoots a video of me and on IG telling our story and it goes viral

Phoebe does an interview on student TV and calls for Kace’s re-instatement on the team.

That’s the hardest, Kace being suspended from the team pending the final decision.

After a week of negotiations with the lawyers, and the bombardment of news and social media, the prosecutors don’t bother going forward with the charges and Lassiter calls us both into the SPU President’s office with Reverend Church.

Church renders the decision, saying he’s a believer in redemption. Jack Hunter is a perfect example of a mistake not ruining a life. He’s a starting QB in the NFL now.

“I expect you to do us proud, Kace, make a splash in the NHL, keep your nose straight while you do it—but not before you win us a championship in the Frozen Four this year.”

“As for you, Ms. Rose, your problems, as well as your tragedies are more severe. Your redemption will be harder and I suspect your road longer. But, I will not stand in your way under some strict guidelines, PSU is prepared to give you your chance. Again.”

“You must attend AA meetings regularly and we will engage your sponsor to report to us as a requirement. You must maintain a GPA of 3.0 or better and you must not drive or maintain a vehicle on campus.

“What about my work-study job at the campus day-care?” I don’t believe I’m brave enough to ask, but I do. I want that job back so much. My heart pounds.

Reverend Church’s face goes soft, filled with compassion as he shakes his head. The pressure of tears against my lids stings like acid.