Page 146 of Carousel

Most of the officers have left – there was talk of checking on pilots and gunners. Ephraine, Dezeeves and Meg are having their own conversation at length by the control table, their backs to us and words inaudible to me.

I’m aware Drake is beside me, but I’m trying not to look at him. I really don’t have the energy for a conversation with him. I feel fogged up. Soft, like maybe part of me is still recovering from the osimidite.

Watching the engineers is fascinating. Their ships are only large enough for one person and seem to be operated by pedal. The hoses they’ve been fastened with are quenching the flames with water and a kind of foam, and whorls of black smoke are whipped up by the strong wind force that seems to exist out there.

“How are you feeling?” Drake’s voice asks me quietly, in Rhavnan.

I sigh. I knew I wouldn’t be able to ignore him forever.

“Terrible,” I say, turning to him at last. “We helped Hevalla against Rhavna. Which is exactly what we didn’t want to do.”

“It was one battle,” he states. “Not the war.”

“What was the point of the battle? The Queen had us in the palm of her hand. And she just retreated?”

“You lived in the Palace with her. You tell me.”

“I can’t help but think it was all to deliver that message.” I wince. “A stupid message about dinner!”

“Just because we do not yet understand her message, does not mean it was stupid. From what I know of the Queen, she is a lover of one thing.”

“Theatrics?” I say, with a scoff.

It’s a joke.

But Drake keeps his dark eyes steady on mine.

My teeth graze my lip. “That’s what you think this is? Why you think she killed a bunch of our soldiers – and got some of hers killed in the process? She just wanted some drama?”

“It is the only conclusion. She could have killed us. She did not. She is not known as the Queen of Hubris for nothing.”

I’m starting to see it.

“But what could that message possibly be about? For her to decide to deliver it with such… flair?”

Outside, the last of the flames have been doused and the smoke is clearing. The engineers travel down towards the docking pods.

It’s only us now, and the night sky.

Drake shifts his weight between his feet. “Perhaps it is not what the message is about, that is the point.” His eyes flick towards the control table. “But to whom it was intended.”

I nod. The words swoop out of me like seabirds. “It was for Dezeeves. He was completely thrown by the situation. He couldn’t believe it.”

Drake levels his face with mine, and it’s like something brews between us.

My words come out thin. “You think he could be a—” I stumble over the word. “—a traitor?”

I expect him to flinch at my words. Give me ten reasons how that couldn’t be possible.

He is completely, unnervingly, unfazed.

“You already thought he was,” I whisper.

“It’s why I needed the radio,” he says, an edge to his voice. “I needed to ask some contacts if they could confirm that. Unfortunately, they could not.”

I wince. “I’m sorry, Drake. About the radio⁠—”

“We do not need to discuss it. But I do need you to help me, if there comes another time. If you really are loyal to Rhavna.”