Page 166 of Carousel

But there’s no magic around me. No magic at all.

I’m sobbing. Because it’s no use. He’ll be shot any minute and I’ll have to sit here listening to it.

His death will be on my hands.

I’m so sorry, Drake. I can’t get to you. I’ve tried everything.

It’s like I’m already mourning him. I feel emptier than my magic.

“You were satisfied.”

“I am really not sure⁠—”

I hear new sounds. Light footsteps. A female voice, low and drawling.

“What the hell is wrong with her?”

Instantly, the tension releases. The band goes slack.

I stop my sobs. Listen harder.

“Meg. We were just talking about you. We need to get Ara back to your cabin⁠—”

“Meg. I mean this with all due respect, but I hadn’t realised a Rhavnan would be placed in⁠—”

“Zander. Please step aside so I can get to my charge.”

“I— ”

“And why is your vest off?”

“It’s… hot.”

“UI. One strike – for now. I hope you haven’t had any others this week. A stint in the brig for you would be rather ironic, wouldn’t it?”

They’re walking me, my real body, between them. My feet trail the floor and my cheek brushes Drake’s occasionally. I hear everything. Feel everything.

But I’m still locked out.

“You found us,” Drake states, from my left, as we climb up stairs. They take them slowly.

“It didn’t require a Master of Spies,” Meg spits, from my right. “You’re idiotic. Both of you.”

“She wanted to see him.”

“You could have used one great little word we have in our language. It’s called, no.”

“She can be persuasive,” he mumbles – which I find bizarre. He never mumbles.

“I haven’t found that,” Meg counters. “Perhaps the problem lies with you. Perhaps you are just easy for her to persuade.”

“Meg,” he warns, darkly.

“No, really. You must be the most benevolent prince alive. Taking your future queen to see her lover.”

“It was an enjoyable experience all around, I can assure you.”

Inside my mind, I’m sitting straighter.