Page 191 of Carousel

And I lock eyes with Drake, a few rows back.

I’d seen him instantly, even though he’s in standard uniform now, blending in despite being taller, broader and darker than the other soldiers. As if I’d already known exactly where he would be.

I’m convinced he’s smiling.

“Wait here,” I order Riss.

And I’m storming. That’s the only way I can describe it. I want to rain floods down on him. Feel myself roar. Tear him away from me, my world.

I plough into him, shoving him with both my hands. He hardly moves.

“You!” I yell.

I’m causing a scene.

I don’t care.

I go to shove him again.

He grabs my hands, halting me.

Someone asks Drake, “Are you all right?”

How ridiculous that is. Asking him if he’s all right...

Drake brushes off the question. “We are fine. Ara is simply upset at the situation and needs someone to take it out on.”

People step away from us.

I want to cry but I’m too enraged. If I keep feeling rage like this, I’ll never cry again.

“Why did you do that?” I say in Rhavnan, probably louder than I should. “I had a clear shot.”

He pulls me closer to him by my hands, which are still enclosed in his. “What if you were caught? It’s an assault on a State Craftsman. Not to mention a slippery slope. Rig a trial for your boyfriend. What next? Murder for him?”

I burst out of his grip. “Coming from you,” I hiss up at him, rolling my wrists. “You cheat. You lie.”

“When it serves a valid purpose⁠—”

“You want to use your power to – what did you call it? Topple the queen.”

“Different,” he states, dryly.

I could shove him again. “It’s not different.”

“One involves ending the rule of a tyrant.” He flicks his eyes up to the platform. “The other – saving a crush from a fate that, by the sound of all of those charges, he deserves. He’s lucky to even be getting a trial.”

“You had no right. My magic is mine⁠—”

“Wrong,” he replies. “All of your magic is mine – stolen from me. Remember?” His smile cuts his face. Looks strange on it, like a crack in smooth stone. He adds in a single breath, “And it’s working better for me than it has this whole time. Or I wouldn’t have been able to block you.”

“Not true,” I say.

“True,” he says. “Perhaps you are feeling differently about me. And our union.”

“I promise you, I’m not. And this isn’t what our magic is supposed to be doing⁠—”

“It is exactly what our magic is supposed to be doing. We should be blocking each other when one of us is doing something reckless. Immoral. It is the main purpose of all of this.”