Page 169 of End Game

“She does.”

“So do I.”

My eyes lift to his.

There is considerably more contained in those three words than either of us admits.

Micah and I have been having versions of the same conversation for a few months. The attraction isn’t new, and neither is the fact that both of us are aware of it. Even the possibility of eventually doing something about it has been acknowledged enough times that pretending this is some recent realization would be ridiculous.

What has changed is how often I find myself thinking about it.

And, apparently, how often I want to touch him.

Micah sits beside me but leaves a comfortable amount of space between us. He doesn’t angle toward me or reach for me, and after sitting back, he looks toward the window instead of watching my face for signs that I am improving.

“Do you want to talk?” he asks.

“No.”

“Okay.”

Then he stays.

There is no attempt to solve the problem for me, no reassurance that my mother means well, and no reminder that my boundary is reasonable.

He simply occupies the quiet with me without asking anything from it.

After another minute or so, I notice something different. “Are you using different shampoo?”

Micah turns his head slowly, a look of bemusement on his face. “What?”

“Your hair smells different.”

His eyebrows rise a little. “That’s what you’re thinking about?”

I shrug.

He laughs under his breath. “Dex bought some expensive shit and then decided he didn’t like it, so I’m using it.”

I nod.

“He said it made him smell like a Scandinavian lumberjack and was more suited to me.”

I look at him. “I don’t know what that means.”

“Neither do I,” he admits.

The laugh that comes out of me feels disproportionately good for something that stupid.

My attention stays on Micah’s hair after the laugh fades. It’s longer on top than it used to be, and some of it is disheveled from the number of times he has pushed his fingers through it this morning.

Micah notices where I’m looking. “You’re doing it again.”

“Doing what?”

“Looking at me like you’re trying to solve a problem.”

“I frequently am trying to solve problems.”