Page 227 of 4 Corinthians

“He did it because he wanted to make the perfect kid,” Kenbral answered. He looked at me, then at his brother. “He said if the baby couldn’t feel pain and were a fighter like you both, it would be perfect.”

Uri slammed him against the wall again. “Why?”

“Because that’s what big brothers do,” he answered with a humorless chuckle. “I protected you and Corinthians. I told y’all I knew y’all were in love even back then. Her having your baby was the only peace I could give y’all.”

“Then why did you let her think it was Roberts?”

“Robert doesn’t know that Judah is yours,” he told Uri. “He thinks the sperm that was used was his.”

“Why doesn’t he know?”

“I switched it at the last minute,” he said. “Melissa got the sperm from when y’all fucked. I told her Robert wanted it, so of course she did it. I switched it at the last minute. The doctor doesn’t even know.”

***

"I'm sorry," Uri said from his corner of the room. I looked up to see him sitting in a chair. Head down, shoulders tense. His leg bounced in either annoyance or fear; he probably felt both. Dressed in black sweats and a tank top. Gone were the tubes, IVs, and monitors. He looked like himself except when he lifted his head, and his eyes locked on mine. That's when I realized he wasn't okay.

"Uri-"

"Don’t say it's okay," he cut me off, shaking his head. "It’s not okay. What I did will never be okay. Twice Cori." He held up two fingers. "Twice, I've put my hands on you. I've blacked out over something stupid and hurt you. That shit ain't okay. Something is wrong with me."

"There's nothing wrong with you."

"Yes, the fuck there is," Krude yelled. He stood in the middle of the room glaring at Uri. "It's definitely something wrong with your ass."

"Krude."

"Nah, nope," he said, turning to face me. "It's something wrong with that nigga, and I ain't saying that shit to be funny. I'm telling y'all the truth. I get y'all had some fucked-up shit happen to y'all, but that nigga is right. Something is wrong. He shouldn't be putting his hands on you."

"And you shouldn't be forgiving him," Ex said. He stood leaning against the wall across from Krude. After everything calmed down, Cross called our cousins, and Psalms told them what had happened and they'd shown up. No one was letting Uri get close to me. "I know you love that nigga, but when is enough going to be enough? What if someone isn't around to stop him and he kills you or Judah?"

"I wouldn't hurt Judah," Uri said, shaking his head. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his legs. "I shouldn't have even touched Cori. Either time, I know that. I feel like shit because of it."

"You should be dead," Krude told him. "Right now, we shouldn't even be having this conversation. We should be burying the parts of your body that the meat grinder didn't crush well enough."

"Krude."

"Stop fucking saying my name, Corinthians!" He yelled. "Stop making fucking excuses for this nigga and admit that y'all are bad for each other! That y'all got too much damn trauma, that y'all being together ain't a good idea! Y'all are each other's triggers! You don’t think we see that shit?! You don’t think we haven’t talked about it? That we aren't secretly scared that we are going to wake up to a murder suicide because he's going to snap and kill you, then feel so much guilt he's going to kill himself, and Judah will be an orphan? Huh? You think we ain't thought about that shit? Because we fucking have! We have, and that shit ain't a thought we want."

"She gets it," Psalms said from beside me. Her hands interlaced with mine. I could feel her shaking. "She gets it."

"Then she needs to make a decision," Ex said. "Right here, right now. She needs to decide what she's going to do." He turned to me. "Are you going to let this nigga eventually kill you, or are you going to pick you and Judah?"

"I’m not in an abusive relationship."

"Aren't you?!" Krude questioned. "Because the bruises around your neck say otherwise."

"I’m not in an abusive relationship!" I yelled, glaring at him. Was Uri perfect? No, but nothing he did to hurt me was intentional. It wasn’t anger directed at me. They were moments of fear, from our childhood manifesting into actions he couldn't control. He wasn’t choking me. He was choking his past so that he could be in the present. "He didn’t mean it! Either time! Y'all saw it! Y'all saw him! How he reacted! That wasn’t anger or hatred. It was fear both times, and it wasn’t even directed at me! I was just there. Through it all, I was there. As a kid and now. Me! Not y'all!"

"Then admit that this shit ain't safe for you!" Ex yelled. "Admit that he needs help! That you can’t help him! Admit it!"

"No!" I yelled, getting up from the floor. If my cousins thought for one second that I was giving up on Uri when I'd just got him, they'd lost their minds.

"Cori..."

"No, Uri!" I replied, not turning to look at him. I couldn’t because if I did, I would see in his eyes what I heard in his voice. He was going to agree with them. He was going to say we couldn’t be because it was too much. That we were too much. That too much had happened, and I wouldn’t accept that. Not after all this time. Not with everything we'd been through and still had to do. Us not being together wasn't acceptable.

"Cori, look at me," he softly demanded.