Page 51 of Her Courage

"Hot date with your three studs?" She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Some fancy restaurant where dinner costs more than my rent?"

I laughed despite myself. "Not exactly a restaurant."

"Ooh, mysterious." She leaned forward, resting her chin on her palm. "Come on, spill it. What's got you all twisted up like this? You're practically vibrating with anxiety."

Something in her tone—genuine concern beneath the teasing—made me pause. When was the last time I'd had a female friend I could talk to about... well, any of this? My relationship with three men. My Little tendencies. My fears.

"We're going somewhere I've never been before," I said carefully, testing the waters. "Somewhere important to them."

"Uh-huh." She nodded, encouraging me to continue.

"It's just—I want to fit in. I want to belong there, with them, in their space." The words tumbled out faster now. "And what if I don't? What if I'm too awkward or I say the wrong thing or⁠—"

"Lottie." Ashlei's voice cut through my spiraling thoughts. "Those men look at you like you hung the moon and stars. Trust me, wherever you're going, you already belong."

I twisted my fingers together, picking at my cuticles. "It's not that simple."

"It never is." She studied me for a moment, her eyes gentle. "Listen, whatever's got you wound up, I'm sure it'll be fine. Those three worship the ground you walk on. Anyone with eyes can see that."

"I know." I took a deep breath, deciding to take a risk. "We're going to a club. A... special kind of club."

Her eyes widened slightly, but she didn't react otherwise. "Special how?"

"It's called The Sandbox," I said, watching her face carefully. "It's a private⁠—"

The change was immediate. Ashlei's entire face lit up, her professional composure momentarily forgotten as she bounced in her chair. "Scarlet Rose? Oh my god, you're going to Scarlet Rose?"

I blinked, stunned. "No, The Sandbox—it's part of the Scarlet Rose complex, but it's separate⁠—"

"Oh my god." Her voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper despite us being alone in the office. "I knew they were Daddies! I told Jace they had that vibe! The way Mr. Volkov watches you like he's cataloging your every move? And Mr. Wulf with those little touches when he thinks no one's looking?" She smacked the desk. "And Professor Silver Fox? Come on."

My jaw dropped. I stared at her, unable to form words as my brain tried to process what was happening. "You... what... how do you⁠—"

"Oh, honey." She reached across the desk to pat my hand. "The community isn't that big, especially here in Portland. I've been going to Scarlet Rose for years. Not the Sandbox—I'm not a Little—but the main club."

I was frozen, my heart thundering in my chest. "You're in the lifestyle?"

"Scene veteran, five years running." She grinned. "Submissive switch, leaning dominant with newer partners. Jace and I have an open dynamic—he's my primary Dom, but we play with others occasionally."

"Jace is your..." I trailed off, struggling to reconcile this new information with the professional assistant I'd worked alongside for months.

"Fiancé. Dom. Pain-in-my-ass sometimes." She laughed. "He works in IT for that biotech firm downtown. You'd like him."

"I had no idea." My voice was faint.

"That's kind of the point, isn't it?" Her expression softened. "We don't exactly advertise it during job interviews. 'Hi, I'm Ashlei, I organize files by day and get spanked at a BDSM club on weekends!'"

A surprised laugh burst from my throat. The tension that had been building in my shoulders all week suddenly eased.

"How did you know about Kaleb and Andrei?" I asked. "We've been so careful."

"Please." She rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "The way they look at you? Pure Daddy energy. Especially Mr. Volkov—sorry, Andrei. That man radiates 'strict Daddy Dom' vibes like it's his cologne."

I couldn't help but giggle. She wasn't wrong.

"And Colby—the professor? I've seen him at Scarlet Rose a few times. Always observing from the sidelines, never participating. The voyeur type."

Heat flooded my cheeks. Again, not wrong.