Page 55 of Scarbound

“What were they talking about?”

“Gong, of course. That was all we talked about anymore.”

“What did you hear?”

“My mother said, ‘I just don’t know what else to do, Seojun.’ Her voice was barely holding. She looked drained. The light that usually lived in her eyes had dulled under the weight of everything that had happened.”

“And your father?”

“He rubbed his temples and sighed. Then he said, ‘I’m tired of having the same conversation over and over. There’s nothing wrong with Gong. He’s struggling with puberty. If we give him time, he’ll come around.’”

“What did you do when you heard that?”

“I knew I had to step in. I was worried about Ji-Woo, about what Gong’s episodes were doing to him. Anxiety twisted in my stomach, but I spoke anyway.

“I said, ‘Of course something is wrong with Gong. How can you be the only one who doesn’t see it? We need to take him to a doctor. Dad, his episodes are getting worse. We can’t keep putting Ji-Woo in the middle of this.’”

“How did he respond?”

“He snapped at me. ‘What are you talking about? There’s nothing wrong with Gong. Stop speaking badly about your brother.’”

“What did his refusal feel like?”

“Frustrating. It was as if naming it would somehow make it real. As if pretending not to see it would make it disappear.

“I pressed my hand against the table. My voice came out louder than I intended. ‘Dad, why can’t you accept it? It won’t disappear just because we pretend not to see it. Gong is sick.’

“But he kept shaking his head, refusing to meet my eyes.”

“What were you afraid would happen if he continued denying it?”

Noeul’s fingers tightened around each other. “I was afraid Ji-Woo would get hurt. I told him, ‘We can’t keep Ji-Woo away from home forever. And we can’t let him see Gong like this. It isn’t fair to him. Gong could be a danger to Ji-Woo.’”

“How did your mother react?”

“She reached across the table and placed her hand over Dad’s.”

“Did she say anything?”

“No.” His voice quieted. “She left me alone in that fight.”

Dr. Kim leaned forward slightly. “You remember that part very clearly.”

Noeul nodded.

“What did you need from your mother at that moment?”

The question seemed to catch him off guard. “I don’t know. For her to say something, I suppose. Anything.”

“To support you?”

“…Yes.”

“And when she didn’t?”

“I felt alone.”

Dr. Kim allowed a brief silence before asking, “What had made you believe Ji-Woo needed to be away from home?”