Page 117 of Barinov

He turns back to her and I see him catch himself as he tries to square his shoulders. His side hitches with a quick, uneven movement. He tries to mask the flinch behind a cold stare, but he’s not fooling either of us.

“I understand,” he says, giving her a sharp, singular nod.

♥♥♥

NOX - Room 1122

Lex hardly talked on the ride home from The Pit. He just glared out the window of my car. All I got out of him was a few yeahs and a couple hushed grunts.

“Do you want to come tonight?” I ask, heading to the closet to grab a change of clothes.

“Where?” he grits.

“The basketball game, remember? Ellie and Haley—”

“They won’t want me there,” he cuts in, ripping off the sling and throwing it on the bed. “I’m gonna go take a shower.”

“Do you need me to help with—”

“I can do it, Cade!” he snaps so loud it echoes in the small room, causing me to flinch.

“O-okay,” I whisper, my shoulders rising. “I’ll… I’ll just leave you alone.”

He tenses again, like maybe he wants to take it back. But he doesn’t say another word. He disappears into the bathroom, the wooden door slamming shut behind him.

I sink down onto the bed, leaning forward just enough to pull my phone out of my back pocket.

ME: I don’t know what to do.

MOM: What happened?

ME: He won’t talk to me anymore.

MOM: It’s only been a few days. Plus, he loves you, sweetheart. You know that.

ME: Doesn’t feel like it.

MOM: He does. Think about it from his shoes. Lex has always been the strongest one. The protector for you and Bella. Now he’s broken and doesn’t know how to lean on others.

ME: He’s not leaning on anyone. He’s pushing everyone away.

MOM: Then push your way back in. You’ve done it before.

ME: That was different. We had Bella and she was always better at getting through to him.

MOM: That’s a lie.

ME: What?

MOM: I love Bella. I do. But honey, he loved you first. YOU! You always were a calm to his raging fury before he ever knew that girl existed. Show him that hasn’t changed. You don’t need Bella to get through to him.

“Cade,” Lex’s voice calls out from the bathroom.

I drop my phone, push myself up from the mattress, and cross the room. Inside the bathroom, steam curls in thick, heavy ribbons, choking the mirror until my reflection is nothing more than a phantom.

“You alright? Need something?” I ask.

“Just…” He exhales, slow and shaky. “Can you just come in here please?”