Page 80 of Fake it With Me

“I’m here,” I whispered. “I’m right here.”

We came together this time, both of us shuddering with the force of it. He collapsed beside me, pulling me against his chest and squeezing me so tightly it was difficult to breathe.

“Stay,” he murmured. “Don’t go back to your room.”

“I won’t.”

Despite the amazing orgasms, I could feel tension in him.

“What’s wrong?” I asked quietly.

He was silent for so long I thought he might not answer. “The custody hearing is Thursday.”

“I know.”

“I can’t stop thinking about it. About what happens if things don’t go our way.”

I propped myself up on my elbow so I could see his face. He looked vulnerable. Gone was the confident billionaire and the successful businessman. This was just a father, terrified of losing his child.

“Talk to me,” I said softly.

“I don’t know what I’ll do if I lose her, Liza.” His voice cracked slightly. “She’s my whole life. Everything I do, every decision I make, it’s all for her. And the thought of some judge deciding I’m not fit to be her father and Sasha deserves custody after abandoning her for three years makes me crazy.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“You don’t know that. Nobody knows that. The legal system is unpredictable, and Sasha’s lawyers are good, and that goddamn photo.” He pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes. “Even if they give us joint custody, that would be a nightmare. Having to share her, send her back and forth like she’s a piece of property being divided up. Knowing she’s with Sasha half the time and I can’t protect her, can’t be there if she needs me.”

“Darek, don’t get ahead of yourself.”

“She wouldn’t even know what to do with herself if she wasn’t around,” he continued, the words pouring out now like he’d been holding them back for too long. “She’s seven years old. She needs routine, stability, and consistency. And Sasha—what does that woman even know about being a mother? She ran away because she felt like it. Wrecked her little girl’s life selfishly because motherhood was too hard.”

I stayed quiet and let him unload.

“And the worst part is, I won’t even be able to relax when Daisie’s with her. I’ll spend the entire time terrified that Sasha will fuck up and my baby will be in danger. Or maybe Sasha will realize that she doesn’t actually want to be a parent. She’ll damage Daisie even more than she already has. Or what if she’s still a bad parent? What if she leaves Daisie alone or doesn’t pay attention? I don’t know where she lives. I don’t know if she has a pool or if she lives in a penthouse without bars on the windows.”

“Stop.” I put my hand on his chest, feeling his heart racing beneath my palm. “You’re spiraling.”

“I know. I can’t help it.” He finally looked at me, and the fear in his eyes made my own heart ache. “She’s everything to me. I wouldn’t even know what to do with myself if she wasn’t around. Work? What’s the point if I don’t have her to come home to? This house would just be empty space. My whole life would be empty.”

I’d never fully understood what it meant to be a parent. The all-consuming nature of that love. But watching Darek fall apart at the thought of losing Daisie, I finally got it. This wasn’t just love. Fatherhood had rewired his entire existence. He wasn’t a man who happened to have a child. He was a father, and that was the core of his identity now.

“Listen to me,” I said, stroking his hair back from his forehead. “You’re not going to lose her.”

“You can’t promise that.”

“No, I can’t. But I can remind you of the facts. The home evaluation went perfectly. Anyone that has ever met you or her knows you are a damn good father.”

“But the photo.”

“It’s suspicious at best. Your lawyers are looking into it, right? And even if they can’t prove it was doctored, you have your own testimony about what actually happened. You have a spotless record as a father.”

He closed his eyes. “I’m terrified,” he admitted quietly. “I haven’t been this scared ever. I would bungie jump. Skydive. Hell, I would fight a fucking lion. None of that scares me as much as the thought of losing my child. I can’t explain it, but it feels like they’re threatening to cut off both my arms. She is as much a part of me as my arms.”

My heart ached for him. “You have to stay positive.”

“I’m trying. I remember a long time ago I heard someone say when they had their child, their heart started to live outside their body. That’s what it feels like. Daisie is my whole heart walking around. When I’m with her, I feel like I can protect her from just about anything. When I say I would fight a lion, I’m not kidding. I would fight ten of them to protect my daughter. When she’s with Sasha, who is going to protect her?”

“If that happens, you’ll get her a phone. I’ve seen those tracking things parents can put in shoes or necklaces. I know it’s not the same thing, but there will be safeguards. No judge is just going to give Sasha custody. She has to have a home study. You demand your lawyers get pictures and information.”