Page 58 of Housekeeping

I came to a stop in front of my front door and waited a long moment just staring at it before I let myself inside.

Nothing had changed since the last time I was there. I’d cleaned up before I left, but there was a slight musty smell hanging in the room.

“First of all,” I muttered to myself. “Open up the windows.”

My whole apartment only had two proper windows. There was a third, but that was a tiny one in the bathroom so I didn’t usually count it. If I opened the one in my bedroom, I might sleep and forget to close it. Spending my short nap freezing was the last thing I wanted to do. So I went to the kitchen and opened that window as far as it would go. It wouldn’t matter too much if I forgot to close it before I slept because my apartment was several floors up.

I took a glass of water, then looked through my fridge before I remembered there was nothing left in it. Not even in the cupboards. I’d already eaten, Jessi had made sure of that, but a snack might be enough to take my mind off things. I was alone now, just like I’d wanted. I didn’t feel rested at all. But I didn’t think I could go to sleep if I tried.

In an hour or so, I would be getting the results from all that testing, and it would be the decider of what my life would be like going forward. If the cancer wasn’t gone then I was in trouble. If it was then I could only rejoice. Just thinking that my life hedged on a piece of paper… it was enough to drive me crazy.

So, now that I was alone, what should I do? Even though I’d insisted on being alone, I had no idea. I’d figured I would just go to my room, lie down on my bed and sleep the time away with an alarm on my phone to remind me. My doctor wouldn’t even mind if I was a little later, as long as it wasn’t longer than an hour. But when I walked into the bedroom, all I could do was stare at my bed. I didn’t think I could fall asleep. I felt too restless for that.

Maybe listen to music? Or watch TV? Probably not, because I’d be tempted to put on some melodramatic songs that would just lead me to cry, and TV didn’t always catch my interest much. I didn’t even feel in the mood to read online.

“Knitting,” I said to myself. I could always do some knitting to keep my mind occupied; maybe I could do a little, not as much as I used to, but maybe a little would do me some good. It was the one thing that always managed to make me feel calm, after all.

I walked into my bedroom and picked up my last knitting project. I stiffened a little when I realized I could be knitting something for me to use later on, but I shook that thought off quickly. I relocated to the living room and sat down on the couch with a sigh.

I arranged my hands and the knitting needles, but I couldn’t even start because my hands were trembling. I let go of the needles, staring at my trembling hands like it was the first time I’d noticed, feeling a little betrayed.

Before I could pick them back up and try again, there was a knock on the door. It was enough to make me pause, wondering who it could be. It was probably Jessi coming back to check on me one more time but there was force behind that knock, whoever was on the other side of the door was stronger than Jessi.

Could it be…?

My heart went still, then started beating very quickly. When the knocking came again, I started with a gasp. And then, his voice.

“Laura!” he called through the door. “I can see the light is on, so you have to be in there! Please, Laura, let me in!”

Mason… how long had it been since I’d last heard his voice? Too long, because it was making my heart waver, even as loud, obnoxious, and desperate as it sounded. I realized right then that I would have copped out of calling him, but he’d come to me instead.

After some hesitation, I got up, leaving my knitting to the side.

“Laura!” he yelled some more. “Let me in! I swear I will make a scene on your doorstep until you open this door!”

That was enough to bring a smile to my lips, a shaky one, as my eyes stung. The ever-unflappable Mason Thompson, screaming like a lunatic at my door.

With my doubts gone, I took sure steps to the door and opened it. He froze with his fist in the air, like he’d been about to deliver another harsh round of knocking.

I’d hated him, I’d loved him. But right then, I needed someone that wasn’t Jessi, not after what she’d already sacrificed because of me. I just needed a friend, and there he stood.

“Mason.”