Page 139 of Healing Eleanor

But I need the confrontation, some sort of truth to hold onto. “No,” I say quietly, setting the salad aside. “Say it, Lily. Go on.”

Her hands clench, anger heating her voice. “I’m so angry with you.”

“You already said that.” I try to keep my voice flat.

Gabriel and Dillon exchange looks, unsure whether to intervene.

“How could you?” Lily’s voice breaks. “You are my best friend, Eleanor.” Tears spill down her cheeks.

A lump in my throat forms. “I’m so, so sorry, Lily.”

She shakes her head, another tear sliding down. “Sorry isn’t enough. You’ve been starving yourself for months and you thought I wouldn’t notice?”

I try to hold steady. “Honestly? No. I didn’t. None of you knew me before, and I never had friends like this. No one who actually cared.”

Lily’s face crumples. “I love you like a sister. It… it killed me to find out.” She lifts a hand, searching for the right words. “And before you ask—yes, Nik told me. How could you do this to yourself? You are worth so much. So, so much.”

My stomach twists into knots. “Growing up, my mother kept me on a strict diet. Before I was fired from the Metropolitan, my coach told me I looked like a whale on stage.” I shrug weakly. “I just… lost control.” I sniff. “I’m sorry I lied to you, Lily. To all of you.” My gaze lifts to them. “I never meant to betray you. I just… couldn’t stop.”

“You don’t have to explain anything, Eleanor,” Dillon says.

Lily continues anyway. “We forgive you, of course.”

Gabriel and Dillon nod their agreement.

“But you can’t keep doing this to yourself. We want you around.”

Her words make my chest swell. Seeing what I’ve done—not only to myself but to my friends—is a rude wake-up call. “I want to get better,” I whisper, biting my lip. “But I have no idea where to start.”

Lily brightens. “You know my mom is a therapist, right? I’m sure she’d love to help.”

“Really?” I ask, skeptical.

“Of course.” Lily gestures to my phone. “Give me your phone, I’ll put my mom’s number in. You can call her.”

I reach for it on the nightstand and hand it over.

While Lily types, Gabriel clears his throat. “We do care about you, Eleanor. You’re one of us now. You can come to any of us for anything. I’m sorry if we haven’t made that clear.”

“You don’t need to apologize, Gabriel. You didn’t do this,” I say sadly.

“He’s right, though,” Dillon adds between bites. “We should’ve made it clearer that we were here for you—no matter what.”

I bow my head slightly. “Thank you, guys. I don’t deserve any of you,” I say quietly.

“Yes, you do,” Lily counters, still typing away on my phone. She hands it back and reaches for my hands. “Please call her Eleanor. Promise me.”

“I promise,” I give her hands a gentle squeeze before lifting the salad back into my lap.

Lily beams at the sight. “Good. Now give us all the drama.” She plops down beside Gabriel.

I chuckle. “There’s not much to tell.”

“Tell us anyway,” Lily replies, tearing open a ketchup packet and squeezing it onto her lid. “We’ve had a long week.”

Gabriel and Dillon nod, too busy stuffing their faces to add anything.

So while they eat, I tell them everything from the past week: Nik telling me he loves me but walking away, my achilles snapping and the surgery that followed, and finally my mother abandoning me to the wolves.