Page 140 of Healing Eleanor

By the time I finish, all three have stopped eating, their food forgotten as they gape at me.

“Wait, wait, wait—your mother said that to you?” Dillon asks.

“Forget that!” Lily shrieks. “Nik said he loved you?”

Gabriel shakes his head, dipping a fry into her ketchup. “No wonder he’s been moody.”

Dillon barks a laugh. “If men had a period, I’d equate it to how Nik’s acting right now.”

Gabriel and Dillon slap a high five, still laughing at Dillon’s joke.

Lily palms her face. “The two of you are insufferable.”

Dillon grins. “Not as insufferable as Nik.”

Lily groans. “True. He’s been awful this week. I had to practically beg him to come to dinner after opening night with the crew.”

Gabriel chuckles, dipping another fry into Lily’s ketchup. “How’d you manage that?”

A triumphant smile spreads across Lily’s face. “I may have threatened certain body parts with great harm if he didn’t show up.”

Dillon nearly chokes, coughing and laughing at once. “That explains it! He looked like he wanted to kill someone all night.”

Gabriel nods, already reaching for another fry to dunk in Lily’s ketchup.

Lily smacks his hand away. “Get your own, sir.”

I laugh for the first time all week, grateful they’ve turned a terrible few days into a carefree night. Still, the nagging in the back of my mind won’t quit.

“Is Nik really that mad?” I ask, taking a small bite of salad.

Lily shrugs. “I don’t think he’s mad. He just looks resigned. I’ve never seen him so checked out during a performance before. He sat there with this blank stare. Barely clapped. Barely reacted. Honestly, it’s worrying.”

“What happened after he told you he loved you?” Dillon asks, wiping his hands on a napkin. “I mean, I get being upset about you dancing yourself into the ground, but not to this level.”

I sigh and set down my fork. “Well.” My throat grows tight. “I didn’t say it back.”

All three of them say, “What?” at once.

“He didn’t give me the chance.” I try to explain. “After he said it, he told me he couldn’t watch me do this to myself anymore. Said I needed a savior and that he couldn’t be mine.”

They all stare at me, their faces unreadable.

“So… Do you love him back?” Gabriel finally asks.

I push my salad around with my fork, stalling, then force myself to take a bite before answering. “I do,” I confess quietly.

Lily lets out a squeal. “Then tell him! That would turn his frown upside down faster than anything.”

I laugh softly. “No. I can’t.”

“Why not?” Dillon asks. “Like Lily said, we could really use Nik with his frown flipped.”

I shake my head, smiling faintly. “I’m no good for him. Plus, he’s my coach…” My voice trails off.

The truth sits heavy in my chest. Part of me will always love ballet, but it’s also the thing that nearly destroys me. With each passing day, the thought of going back feels less and less appealing.

Lily waves a dismissive hand. “Please. Nobody in the studio would know if the two of you dated.”