Page 157 of Healing Eleanor

I shake my head, exasperated. “I’m fine. You don’t need to do all of this.” I gesture between the three of them.

Lily steps forward, fire in her eyes. “This is necessary. You’ve been a total jerk since Eleanor fell in December, and after Irina passed away, you’ve been so consumed by your own sadness that you’ve forgotten you still have friends who love you and care about you.”

Her words hit harder than I expect. I sit back, stunned. “I appreciate that, really. But I’m handling it.”

“Doesn’t look like it to me,” Lily shoots back, her voice breaking at the edges. She presses her lips into a tight line. “You’re like a brother to me, and it’s been killing me to watch you waste away like this.”

I open my mouth to argue, but Dillon leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “She has a point, Nik. You’ve been shutting everyone out,” he says. “I get grief—we’ve all been there, too. But locking yourself away doesn’t heal anything. It just makes the loneliness worse.”

I swallow the growing lump in my throat.

Gabriel finally speaks, voice low but firm. “We’re not saying don’t grieve. We’re saying don’t drown in it. Irina wouldn’t want that for you. And Eleanor…” He presses his lips into a thin line, pausing. “You’ve been running from her too. Pretending like you don’t care, when we can all see you do.”

Lily throws her hands up. “Finally, someone said it!”

“Lily,” Gabriel warns, his voice sharp.

She ignores him, eyes drilling into me. “You love her, Nik. And I swear, if you let her slip away because you’re too scared to face the truth, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”

I glance at Dillon, hoping for an out, but even he nods in agreement.

“We’re not saying you have to have everything figured out,” he says gently. “But you do need to stop hiding from everyone.”

The room grows painfully still. Louie hops onto my lap, pressing close like he can shield me from their words.

And maybe that’s when I realize this isn’t about them dragging me into an intervention, but about people loving me too much to let me keep wasting away.

I clench my jaw, staring at the floor so I don’t have to meet their eyes. My fingers dig into Louie’s fur as though I can anchor myself there.

“I’m fine,” I mutter, the words sounding emptier the second time.

“No, you’re not!” Lily’s voice cracks, louder than before. “You shut us out after Daria. You’re shutting us out again. And this time you’re not just hurting yourself, you’re hurting Eleanor too.”

Her words slice through me like a knife.

“Lily—” Gabriel tries to stop her, but she keeps going.

“She loves you, Nik! And I’ve watched her struggle, cry, and still fight for you in her own way. And what do you do? Hide. Mope. Pretend like pushing her away will protect you. It won’t!” Her hands ball into fists. “One day you’re going to wake up and realize she’s gone, and it’ll be because you let her slip through your fingers.”

I can’t hold it in anymore. The pressure that’s been building since Mama’s funeral shatters wide open.

“I know!” The word tears through my chest, raw and ragged. My hands tremble as I press them to my face.

Louie jumps down, startled.

“I know I’m screwing this up. I know I’m losing her. I just…” My voice breaks. “I don’t know how to do this without my mother. I don’t know how to carry this pain and still love someone else at the same time.”

The room falls silent. Only the sound of my uneven breathing fills the space.

Then, softly, Dillon says, “That’s why you don’t do it alone.”

I bury my face in my hands, unable to stop the tears now. The room blurs, my chest tightening until I think I might break apart right there in front of them.

Dillon’s voice cuts through cautiously. “Nik…”

Before I can respond, Lily sinks down on the floor in front of me, placing both her hands over mine. Her eyes shimmer, fierce but tender. “You’ve carried us all when we needed it. It’s our turn now.”

Gabriel shifts forward on the couch, his hand landing heavy and grounding on my shoulder. Dillon leans in too, placing his palm on my other side.