Page 65 of The Duke’s Matchmaker

Dorothy hung her head. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to be rude. All I mean is…I told you many times that there was nothing romantic happening with Nathaniel, and the two of you refused to take me at my word. You insisted on acting as though we were about to announce our engagement at any moment. Well, now you’re just going to have to believe me when I speak the truth about us, which is that there was never anything there. It was always a friendship. Nothing more.”

“Is that the way you behave with your friends, then?” Honora asked. “Sneaking into rooms at parties to kiss them? Nothing at all romantic about that, I suppose? I’m the fool for having thought so?”

Dorothy couldn’t answer, because of course Honora was right. That moment had been full of passion, more than she had ever experienced before in her life. It was hopeless to try and deny it.

“I’m going to write to him at once,” Honora said, moving toward the writing desk at the center of the room. “I’m going to make sure he understands the position he’s put you in, and I’m going to insist that he come here and remedy it by doing the right thing. If he’s any kind of man at all, he will.”

“And I suppose it doesn’t matter that I don’t want you to do that?” Dorothy asked her sister.

Honora sighed. “Truly, Dorothy, I don’t think you know what you want anymore,” she said. “I might have thought you did once upon a time. But to know that you were kissing this man just last night, and now you’re behaving as though you want nothing to do with him…it doesn’t add up. Don’t you realize that? It’s not that I don’t want to take you at your word, but your actions don’t match up with what you’re telling me, and I have to try to make something of it, Dorothy. I’m your elder sister. It’s my responsibility to care for you.”

Dorothy hung her head. She had lost all credibility and she knew it. There was no point in trying to insist to her sisters that she wanted nothing to do with Nathaniel. Honora was right. Her actions had shown otherwise. It was apparent now that she did have an interest in him.

And she couldn’t lie about it to herself any longer, either. The thought of him asking for her hand, asking her to join his family and be a mother to Colin and spend every day with him…it ignited something in her that she couldn’t light up on her own. It was some strange blend of hope and desire and burning grief that it could never be real, for of course he wouldn’t really ask her that.

And if he did, I know what I would say. Nothing had changed on that score. No matter how strongly she felt about Nathaniel, she still didn’t wish to marry. The idea of going through the grief her sisters had suffered was even more horrible now that she had someone to imagine losing. If she allowed herself to believe in a life with Nathaniel only to have it taken away if he were to die…that would be too terrible. It would be worse than she had ever imagined it to be, because in spite of herself, she had grown to really care for him. Not just the idea of him, but the man himself.

I can’t have him stolen from me like that. I have to give him up voluntarily. It’s all I can stand.

She knew she couldn’t stop Honora from writing that letter. She’d just have to hope that Nathaniel knew better, and that he wouldn’t come for her.

But just as she was thinking this, Mulligan the butler appeared in the doorway of the sitting room.

“Begging your pardon, Lady Dorothy,” he said. “You have a visitor.”

Dorothy’s breath seemed to freeze in her lungs. This couldn’t possibly be anything good.

When she didn’t speak for a few moments, Abigail stepped in. “Who is it, Mulligan?”

“His Grace the Duke of Henshaw, Lady Abigail,” Mulligan replied. “He says he needs to speak to Lady Dorothy at once.”

Of course he had said that. Of course he had come. What had she been thinking, hoping that he wouldn’t? One way or another, this was going to be dealt with.

Dorothy didn’t know whether she hoped he would blame the whole thing on her, or whether she wanted him to take accountability and ask for her hand.

The truth was, both outcomes seemed equally awful.

CHAPTER 33

“Your Grace, we’re so glad you could join us today,” Lady Honora said stiffly.

She didn’t look glad. She was barely meeting his eyes. Her shoulders were tense and her arms were crossed defensively in front of her. She was angry. Well, that was to be expected. Nathaniel had rather hoped she wouldn’t be here at all. It would have been easier to have this conversation with Dorothy if there hadn't been elder sisters present to watch.

Lady Abigail seemed less angry. She was watching him as if she thought she might deduce something about his intentions before he even spoke. But Nathaniel only had eyes for Dorothy.

Her head hung. She hadn’t yet looked at him. And yet, something told Nathaniel that she hadn’t been cowed or diminished by what happened. There was a tension to her that let him know her fire burned as brightly as ever. At any moment, he thought, she was sure to look up and say something sharp and cutting that would change the nature of the whole moment, just as she always did.

For now, though, she said nothing. It was Lady Honora who spoke again.

“I was just writing you a letter,” she said. “It was my intention to request your presence here. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you the reason why.”

“You don’t need to tell me,” he agreed.

“Good.”

“I was up all night pondering what to do about the situation,” he said. “And I came as early as I thought it would be appropriate to do so without disturbing anyone.”

“We’ve been up for hours,” Lady Abigail said quietly. “Dorothy told us what happened when she arrived home last night. No one here has gotten very much sleep.”