Page 60 of No Fear

“I do care. Her brother was my best friend. He died in a car accident ten years ago and I left Albany and Charlie. Left her to deal with his death alone. I regret that. I can't go back and change what I did, but I intend to be there for Charlie as the friend I should have been all these years.”

Mackie grinned at him. “Yeah. I’m sure that’s all it is.”

***

CHARLIE SAT AT HER desk having just finished a meeting with the US Consul General and other embassy staff where she had been briefed on their current projects.

It had been much harder than usual keeping her attention on what was being said as thoughts of Donnie kept distracting her. She had replayed every second of what happened from the moment he’d kissed her. Multiple times. His mouth, his hands, his tongue. Her pussy throbbed at the memories. She’d always believed sex would be good with Donnie, but the reality had far exceeded her imagination. She had no idea her body could feel the way he had made it feel. And she loved it. Could get addicted to it. To him. Her high school crush had wanted her. Had been aroused by her. Had spent all his time pleasuring her. She didn’t even get to see his cock! She actually felt guilty he’d done all the work, but he hadn’t seemed to care. The man sure wasn’t selfish, and he had opened her eyes to what she’d been missing. Damn, she wanted to do it again. And again.

Waking up to his note had sent a wave of disappointment over her, but she’d known he had to leave. It’s not like they were suddenly boyfriend and girlfriend. Hell, she'd asked him for sex. Again. She didn’t regret it, but what happened now? The brief texts earlier had eased her worry a little, but she was nervous about talking to him when he called. Did they just go back to friends after all the things he’d done to her? She shivered at the memory, clamping her thighs together as her body begged for more.

It was almost one. Lunchtime. Grabbing her purse, she decided to get some fresh air. As she walked along University Avenue she called Maddie.

“Hey, I was going to call you later. How’s your first day?” Maddie answered.

“Going well. How are you? Dave said you were sick?”

“Just exhausted, I think. I’m always worn out with two kids, but it was nice to get some rest. Sorry I missed your call. Everything OK?”

“Um. There’s been a few developments.”

“Well, don’t keep me in suspense.”

“I ended it with Simon, and I slept with Donnie.”

The shriek at the other end of the phone had Charlie holding the phone away from her ear.

“Oh, my God. Tell me everything.”

Charlie filled her best friend in on all the details. Well, almost all.

“Whoa! I am so damn proud of you.”

Charlie stepped into a sandwich shop and joined the line. “Proud?”

“Yes. You not only stood up to Simon, but you went after what you wanted with Donnie and got it.”

Yes, she had. But she’d been questioning her decision and what it said about her all morning.

“Does it make me a terrible person? I was an engaged woman the day before. Within hours I’m in someone else’s bed. What if Donnie thinks I’m some kind of... hell I don’t know... lush.” Charlie shuffled forward in the line.

“Charlie, don't do that. There was nothing wrong with what you did. If you were a guy, men would be slapping you on the back. Besides, Donnie isn’t some stranger.”

“I know. But I loved Simon. Or thought I did. Maybe Donnie was right when he said I needed to take time to process the breakup.”

“Things haven’t been right with you and Simon for a while. After what you just told me about his behavior at the hotel, you know you did the right thing ending it. He didn't deserve you. Have you spoken to Simon?” Maddie asked.

“One sec.” Charlie covered the mouthpiece of the phone and ordered a salad for take-out. “Sorry, just ordering lunch. No. He’s called, left messages, texted. I guess he went back to New York.”

“Wow, way to fight for the woman he’s supposed to love.”

“I know.”

“Do you miss him? Have you thought about calling him?”

Charlie sighed. “No. I’ve barely thought about him at all. But when I do, like now, it does make me sad. We were together for a year, and we did have some good times. I’m disappointed in him. Angry. Hurt.”

“It’s OK to remember those good times and be sad that it's over. You were going to marry him. And you have every right to feel hurt and angry. But it’s also OK to know you did the right thing and to move on. If for you that was getting laid – you go, girl!”