Page 96 of Wild Abandon

I give her shoulder a little nudge. “You’ll never know unless you try.”

“All right.” Scarlet blows a loud puff of air out of her mouth. Then, she rises and walks across the street.

There are two boys and a girl playing. When Scarlet walks over, the little girl stops running and walks over to Scarlet. They talk for a moment, and then they shake hands, their fists jumping up and down rather dramatically. The little girl asks Scarlet something. Scarlet shakes her head and says something back, and the little girl shakes her head. Then, the little girl picks up a piece of chalk, and Scarlet agrees. The two fall to their knees and start drawing on the sidewalk. The other girl seems bossy, which could be good for Scarlet. They draw and laugh, and after a while, Scarlet looks back over to me, still on the stoop, and smiles.

Naomi settles next to me with a cup of coffee in her hand, another being offered to me.

“Good job, Aunt Crystal.” She leans into me and puts her head on my shoulder. “You’re gonna be a great mom someday.”

“Yeah, someday,” I sigh. “Believe it or not, that’s not the end game for me anymore.”

“What is?”

I lean my head on top of Naomi’s. “Happiness. Being surrounded by good friends. If I meet someone and fall in love, then I will. If I don’t, I know I have you. I have my family. I have things that matter.”

“Love matters. Just because it didn’t work out with Steven or Nate or Brent—”

“Or the countless dates I’ve been on since I was sixteen,” I interrupt with a grimace.

Naomi offers a half-laugh and then continues, “It doesn’t mean the right man isn’t out there. What happened to the girl who made it her life’s mission to fall in love?”

“I still want that. I still want love. And not with someone who checks all the boxes. I want a real-life love with fighting and making up and sharing each other’s interests even if they’re not your own. The problem with Steven wasn’t just that we had nothing in common. The problem was, we never loved each other enough to try.”

Naomi leans up and offers me a sad smile. “As much as I’ve wanted you to admit that to yourself, it doesn’t feel as victorious as I thought it would.”

“You’re a great friend, Nay. You’re the only person I could love for a decade from three thousand miles away.”

“And you’re the only permanent house guest I would ever allow in my house. To the contrary of the old saying, you are not like fish.”

“Glad to know I don’t smell.”

“Well, sometimes, when you use those bath oils…”

“Ass.” I push her with the side of my body. Her coffee swims in her cup.

“Nerd.” She pushes back.

We look back at Scarlet, who is now playing hopscotch.

“You’re a really great mom. I don’t know many women who, at such a young age, would have created such a beautiful life for their daughter. I don’t think I tell you enough how amazing you are.”

“I had you by my side the entire time. Even if it was through a phone call, you were always there.”

We sit in silence. Sipping coffee, watching life happen.

“I think I should call Steven.”

“I think you should, too,” she says. When she feels my body tense beside her, she adds, “Were you hoping I’d talk you out of it? Give him a call. It’ll be good for you. Both of you.”

I nod into my cup. Naomi picks my cell phone up off the floor, and with a forceful look, she hands it to me and walks back into the house.

The phone feels like a million pounds in my hand. After seven years, I am doing something I should have done…well, seven years ago.

I stand and pace on the porch, listening to the phone ring and hoping it goes to voice mail. And then I hope it doesn’t go to voice mail because then I’d have to think about what to say on said voice mail. But, if he picks up, I’d have to actually talk to him and—

“Hello?” the baritone of the man I met in Paris pours through the phone.

I stop pacing and think of something to say. “Hi.”