Page 52 of Adeline

“Yes, and they have every right to.”

“But you were just a boy.”

“That does not matter,” he retorted, his tone deepening to one of harshness. “They were my family’s people. Their families had served my family for generations. And they lost people they loved, just as I did.”

“That should have brought you all closer in your grief.”

“No, they needed someone to blame, someone to cast in the shadows to help them through their grief.”

“And that was you.” Another statement without a hint of a question.

“It was easier to cast aspersion on a marred, damaged boy than live a lifetime never understanding the hows and whys of the situation. If my accepting the fault gave them a measure of comfort and the ability to move forward, it has all been worth it.”

“But you continue to allow them to blame you.” How had their conversation taken such a dark turn? “Clearly, no one has moved forward.”

“That is not true,” he countered, pulling to a stop to face her. “My close servants have forgiven me.”

She should argue that no forgiveness should have been needed.

“And your scars…do they pain you still?” Adeline kept her focus away from Jasper. If her questions made him uncomfortable, she did not seek to make it worse. “I mean, I do not know their extent, but I can only assume your recovery was a long, arduous time.”

He chuckled lightly, but she was uncertain if it was to distract her from her line of questioning or if he found a jest in her words. “They have not hurt in many years and cover only my cheek, neck, arm, and part of my side to my hip. Yes, it was painful, but nothing as grave as that which my servants suffered at the loss of their loved ones.”

How could he think to compare the two? And how had his people been so blinded as not to see the man beneath the scars? Adeline had no doubt that Jasper had hurt just as fervently—if not more—than those who called Faversham home.

“When I purchased the gunpowder plant after the government abandoned the factory when the war ended, I promised paying positions to any man, woman, or growing boy who sought employment. I’ve worked hard to make amends and bring the people of Faversham back together through prosperous growth in our small town.” His voice cracked once more. “And I nearly lost everything I gained when that wall collapsed on Grovedale. If he—or anyone else—had been seriously injured, my connection to Faversham would have been permanently severed.”

“But that did not happen.”

He began to walk once more. “No, it did not.”

“However, they still call you the Beast of Faversham.”

“It is a title I am used to, Miss Adeline.” He patted her hand where it sat nestled at his elbow. “My aunt preached kindness and compassion in all manner of situations, even when it is necessary to look past unfair treatment of myself.”

“You are superior to me, my lord,” Adeline commented.

“I have had over ten years of practice, Miss Adeline,” he said with a chuckle—not the deep, lighthearted laughter from earlier, but a dark, gravelly sound that had Adeline wondering what other pain he suppressed. “But now, it is time I return you to your brother and ready myself for my first London ball.”

Adeline was shocked to realize they’d arrived at his waiting coach. George, the Ailesbury driver, held the door wide and waited for them to enter. She didn’t want to move, didn’t want to break the private moment they currently shared. There were so many questions still unanswered.

However, when Jasper turned his strained smile on her and held his hand out to assist her up into the waiting conveyance, Adeline knew, rather than suspected, that their conversation was over and Jasper would not be sharing any more about his past…at least for the time being.

Chapter 20

Adeline stared into the looking glass as Poppy slipped the final button through its intended hole and dipped her head to her mistress before departing the room. The door had not so much as latched closed before her friends leapt from their various seats around her bedchambers to stand beside her.

Each woman had selected a gown befitting their individual style. Georgie’s was a low-cut, daring dark red with a glittering jeweled waistband. Josie wore a peach concoction better suited to a girl fresh from the schoolroom than a woman of her age. And, Theo, as always, had chosen a conservative, high-necked, full-skirted, light green dress that enhanced the sheen of her dark hair.

Adeline’s gown was a shimmering blue with a moss green overskirt and cream lace embellishments, and she had a tight pearl choker around her throat. Against her mother’s wishes, Adeline had had her hair curled and left it to hang free over her shoulders and down her back. She cared not a whit women her age preferred their hair arranged high atop their crowns and beaded through with lengths of ribbon or pearls.

Her entire ensemble would not have been something she’d chosen only a month before. Not even a week before.

“You are stunning, Adeline,” Theo gushed.

“The coloring matches your complexion superbly,” Josie sighed, clutching her hands to her chest as she looked ready to swoon.

“And quite reserved for you,” Georgie added.