Page 92 of Blood Money

“But you aren’t single, are you? You were married when you filled out this form. When you lied on this form. You were married then, and you are married now.”

Alex stiffened even more and stared straight ahead. Beside her, Gray sat unmoving. She felt his laser-sharp gaze boring into her. The intensity of his anger and pain was palpable, as if he’d stabbed her with it through the heart.

“Your husband’s name is Jan Mohammad,” Simonetti declared. “There is no divorce decree anywhere. You are still married.” He paused for dramatic effect, Alex was sure.

She squeezed her eyes shut, unable to look at Gray’s reaction. When she opened her eyes and glanced at him, he sat stiffly, staring at her with a cold, blank look.

“Did you ever stop to think about why these questions are important?” Simonetti railed on. “It’s to make sure the NYPD doesn’t hire anyone who could pose a threat to the department, or to the public. And it is most certainly to avoid hiring someone who is working with known terrorists. Your husband has been on the Watchlist for six years. You’re married to a damned terrorist, and you were planted inside the department to feed critical, confidential information to them.” Simonetti stood and pounded his fist on the table. “Isn’t that true, Mrs. Mohammed?”

Alex widened her eyes. She’d been expecting this evil revelation from her past to be revealed sooner or later, but now that the moment was here, she still wasn’t prepared for it.

She couldn’t bear the look of anger and shock she knew was on Gray’s face. Instead, she stood and leaned across the table to lock angry glares with Simonetti. “I did no such thing, and don’t you dare call me by that name.” Being associated with Jan again in any way made her feel dirty, like she’d been tainted by evil and could never get clean.

“Are you denying being married to Jan Mohammed?” Gray’s voice was calm, eerily controlled.

“No.” Straightening, she looked at him, expecting to be faced with his anger, but what she saw scared her even more. There wasn’t a bit of emotion on his handsome face. “But I deny knowing for certain he is a terrorist or that he’s on the Watchlist. I don’t think he was when I married him, and I don’t think he was when I left him. I only know that he was no longer the kind, loving man I married. He’d morphed into an angry, unapproachable person who’d started hitting me, then pilfered my personal and business bank accounts, and threatened to take my child away.”

Alex took a deep breath. Gray was slipping further away from her by the second. “I gathered what little I had left and fled to New York City. I changed my name and did everything I could to keep him from ever being able to find me or Nicky. Even though we were still technically married, from that moment I fled seven years ago I’ve had no contact with Jan.”

She paused to take in Gray’s stiff posture in the chair. His jaw was clenched, his eyes icy, glacial even. “I wanted to tell you this. All of it. But not like this.”

Never like this.

“Like what, then?” Gray’s tone was as devoid of emotion as his face. “You’ve had plenty of opportunity to tell me. What the hell were you waiting for?”

“The timing was never right.” And now it never would be, she realized with utter despair. “When you found that money in my account, you shut me out. You didn’t trust me, and at first I didn’t trust you. I had no idea what to do. The only thing I knew for certain was that I’ve made so many bad decisions in my life I couldn’t afford to make another one. Keeping Nicky safe was too important, and I had to be sure.”

“Sure of what?” Gray bit out.

“That I could trust you.”

“Trust me?” He gave her an incredulous look. “I never lied to you.”

“I know,” she admitted, her shoulders sagging. “But you’re a cop and you have professional obligations. I didn’t know what you would do.”

He remained silent for a moment. “I would have done everything possible to help you. I did do everything possible.”

Again he was right. He’d done nothing but be straight with her the entire time. There was nothing more to say except to reiterate the truth. “I meant to tell you. I really did.”

“When?” he asked, crossing his arms.

She began to reach for him then let her hand fall to her side. It was clear from the tight set of his jaw that he wouldn’t welcome her touch. “I planned to tell you last night, but then we—” Her face grew hot at the memory of exactly what they’d been doing the previous night that had prevented her from telling him about Jan.

Without looking, Alex knew the looks she’d see on the faces of the other men in the room. Knowing smirks, no doubt, particularly from that self-righteous asshole Simonetti. She remained focused on Gray, who sat rigid and stone-faced.

“Then this morning,” she continued, knowing her words were useless but needing him to hear them. “Things were so rushed, I never got the chance. Please believe me.” Her voice had dropped to a whisper, her words meant only for Gray. “Most of all, please believe how sorry I am.”

Alex sat in her chair. When she laid her hand on Gray’s bicep, he leaned back and pulled from her grasp.

“Why didn’t you file for divorce before you bought counterfeit identity documents and left California?” he asked, his tone chilly.

“I couldn’t have done that.” Alex shook her head. “For starters, he would have contested it just to keep Nicky and to continue stealing my hard-earned money. After I came to New York, I couldn’t take the risk of filing because it would have meant lawyers and court dates. Lawyers cost money, which I no longer had, and showing up in court was too risky. I couldn’t chance that he would follow me home one day. I truly believe he would have stolen my son and taken him out of the country.”

“Jesus, Alex.” Gray smacked his fist on the table. His tone was beyond angry. “You should have told me.”

“I meant to. I planned to, really I did.” She searched Gray’s eyes for understanding. And found none.

“So your husband dipped into your accounts,” Simonetti said as he slowly massaged his chin. “That doesn’t justify your actions.”