Page 83 of Ultimate Justice

Blue glared at Evan from a corner of his bed in the FBI office. Someone might as well have drawn frown lines on his dog’s face. The sulking, accusatory look said it all. Blue thought he’d fucked up. He had, but he’d said and done what was necessary.

So why did he feel so hollow inside?

True to her word, the moment Brett and Gemma brought Noah home Saturday night, Marlie called a car service, but his friends had insisted on driving her and Noah to Tish’s house. Ten minutes later, they were gone. He and Blue had watched them leave, staring after them from the front stoop like lovesick puppies. Then Blue had given him the same look he was giving Evan now. He didn’t know a dog could look so pissed.

For the first time since he’d bought the place, the house seemed empty. Things were back to the way they’d been before, only now he didn’t want that. He wanted… He didn’t know what he wanted.

He pounded his fist on the desk, because he was lying to himself. He’d gotten a brief glimpse and a little taste of what he could have had. A family.

Wind buffeted the window. Outside, the sky was gray. Cold weather and light snow were forecast for northern Colorado and southern Wyoming. He glanced at his laptop. Seven a.m. He’d been in since five, reviewing all the reports the teams had written up. So far, nothing added to the probable cause he needed for a warrant. Everything hinged on the flyover.

Footsteps sounded outside his office, along with the scrabbling of claws. Blue leaped to his feet with a snort.

A smiling, furry white face appeared in Evan’s open doorway. Crystal.

“Hey, Evan.” Sammy unhooked Crystal’s leash.

Blue and Crystal touched noses, their tails wagging furiously. Blue arched his back, lifting his head high as he did his strutting thing.

Sammy sighed. “Still in love, I see.”

“No takers yet?” he asked, surprised no one had adopted Crystal.

“Not yet.” She sat on the edge of Evan’s desk. “I’m sure someone will. I’ll be sad to see her go. From the looks of things, so will Blue.”

Somehow, both dogs had managed to squeeze onto Blue’s bed, snuggling and canoodling like a couple of teenagers.

Sammy laughed, then lowered her voice. “She’s off those meds I’ve been giving her, but I haven’t told the boss yet. Once he finds out, he won’t let me bring her into the office anymore. But I don’t have the heart to separate her and Blue, not when they look so happy. Okay if I leave her here with you for a while?”

“No problem. I’ll be here for a couple more hours.”

“Thanks.”

Blue sighed and closed his eyes, looking thoroughly content. Was it possible to be jealous of a dog?

“Morning, sunshine.” Brett hitched his shoulder on the doorjamb. “You look like crap.”

“Feel like it.” Inside and out. Mostly inside. As much as he wanted to ask how Marlie and Noah were, he didn’t. After dropping them at Tish’s, Brett had reported back, confirming Tish’s house was in a gated community with a security company manning the entrance and a top-notch security system at the house.

Brett pushed from the door and sat in a chair. “They’re fine. In case you were wondering.”

“I—” Was. He shoved a hand through his hair. No sense lying. Brett and Deck knew him better than anyone.

“She was pretty upset, though,” Brett added, stretching out his legs. “Not that she cried. She’s too strong a woman for that, but it was obvious some heavy shit went down between you guys. Even Noah picked up on it. He’s a smart kid. He spent half the drive asking why you kicked him and Marlie out. He’s pretty protective of her, said he wanted to punch your lights out for making her so upset.”

Evan grunted. He deserved to get punched.

“If Noah doesn’t, he may have to stand in line. Behind me.” Brett crossed his arms. “You’re being a jackass, you know that? This is the first woman you’ve had real feelings for since I’ve known you, and that’s a pretty long time. I know you’re on a quest to find your sister, but at this point, you have to know that probably won’t happen.”

“Yeah. I know.” Even with the connection between his sister and the camp, the chances of finding her alive after all this time were probably zip. Hearing his friend say it rammed home the truth he’d been denying. “You know, we never gave her a headstone. My parents thought it would be an admission she was really dead.”

Maybe it was finally time to do that, so he and his folks could have a place to visit her in spirit, even if her body wasn’t there. Maybe it would help them all move on and start living again. That, and finally acknowledging another truth.

He wasn’t to blame for Gracie running away. She’d done that all on her own. Marlie had helped him to see it. Now all he wanted was to get off that gerbil wheel.

He saw the tight bonds between his friends and the women they loved and was envious. He wanted that, too, and he’d blown it. “I really fucked things up.”

“Yeah, you did,” Brett said. “It’s not too late to fix it.”