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The Colorful and Creative Threats of the Alpha Female
I took my sweet-ass time to make a decision.
I picked up the phone to call Caleb and then hung up. I highlighted the best route to the valley and then traced another route to the vet clinic. And then I crumpled the map into a ball and tossed it. I couldn’t seem to force myself to take those first steps toward my new life. I was so angry with Caleb. Yes, I’d lied to him, but not to hurt him or trick him. I’d lied to protect myself. He’d known who I was all along. He knew that Glenn was looking for me. And he didn’t tell me that he was being paid to find me. I couldn’t trust anything he told me. I couldn’t believe him when he talked about loving me, wanting me for the rest of my life. I’d heard those words before, and they’d turned into shackles, keeping me tied to a man who wanted to make all of my decisions for me. I wouldn’t go through it again.
Could I believe Caleb when he said he’d meant no harm? As progressive as the valley pack could be, female alpha and all, Caleb had grown up in a world where the protective, dominant male instinct was not only accepted but expected. Male wolves were expected to take care of their families by any macho, bone-headed means necessary. Whether that meant throwing themselves face-first into danger or leaving out a crap load of key details, male werewolves wouldn’t hesitate as long as they thought their actions would keep their mate safe. While female weres could throw down with the best of them, they tended to be a bit more crafty and manipulative. They were more likely to use sex appeal or casseroles to get what they wanted, or sometimes both simultaneously.
More to the point, Caleb had seemed so sincere when he’d given me his reasons for lying. He’d left me at the hotel with the resources to run. If he was only interested in selling me out for money, he could have hog-tied me like Jerry and handed me over to Schuna as soon as I figured out his connection to Glenn.
I had to admit, the life he was offering me wasn’t without its charms. I would be able to return to the valley, the place I’d felt at home in for so long. After a lot of explaining and groveling, I would be accepted back into the pack, the people who had become like family to me.
And yes, I would spend my life with a certain brown-eyed werewolf who made me feel safe and wanted and made my eyelids flutter like window shades. Somewhere in the darkest, deepest recesses of an extremely stubborn and pissed-off soul, I knew I missed Caleb. There were times I missed him so much that I had to curl under the covers and wrap myself around the aching, hollow feeling that spread from my chest.
I tried to write it off as mating magic or readjusting to living alone after getting used to a warm, solid body next to me in bed every night, but I missed the man for himself. I missed his wry humor and the way he made me laugh. I missed the dozens of thoughtful little things he did throughout the day to try to take care of me, even if it meant annoying me. I missed feeling warm and protected and cared for when I fell asleep tucked under his arm. I even missed his lousy my woman done me wrong, stole my truck, and gave my dog fleas country music.
Sometime during my fifth attempt to escape the lobby, I’d come to the conclusion that I was, in fact, in love with the moron . . . which was inconvenient.
I loved Caleb. I loved his kindness and his generosity, which was becoming harder and harder to reconcile with the informational shell game he’d played with me. How could he lie to me for so long? Why hadn’t he just come out that first day after the shooting and told me, Just so you know, I’ve been hired by your skeevy ex-husband to track you down and drag you back to him, but I think you’re my mate, so I’m just going to keep taking his per diem and keep you for myself. More French toast?
OK, maybe that would have been pushing it. But surely, as we got to know each other, he could have let some hints slip gradually.
And then, of course, I probably would have Tasered him and run like hell.
That was beside the point.
Tasers aside, how had he expected me to respond? Was I just supposed to accept this dishonesty from someone who was supposed to love me? Was I supposed to pat him on the head and tell him I understood?
I bought a cheap, reliable truck with new snow tires at a cash-only used-car lot. Traveling with Caleb had given me a confidence I’d lacked on my first trip to the valley. I could take care of myself. I had taken care of myself. And I was careful to keep my baton in Caleb’s special coat pocket, its heavy weight giving me a bit of swagger when I stopped to gas up the truck or grab a bite to eat.
It took four days of driving in pretty questionable weather for me to reach Grundy. I beat a respectable snowstorm by a matter of hours and had to stay at the Evergreen Motel overnight to wait for the weather to pass. I prayed in earnest that it was the last motel I had to avail myself of for quite some time.
The road to the valley had been temporarily blocked by a rockslide on the highway pass. I had to promise Leonard Tremblay discreet, no-questions-asked treatment of certain social maladies in return for a snowmobile ride there. Cooper offered to take me, but Mo was suffering from some insanely intense morning sickness, and I couldn’t, in good conscience, ask him to leave his mate’s side. Nor did I have the heart to tell him that in all of the werewolf pregnancies I’d seen, that level of nausea indicated more than one baby. Possibly three.
After examining Mo and prescribing some ginger tea and extra-strength iron supplements, I hopped onto the back of Leonard’s souped-up, blue-and-purple-flame-emblazoned snowmobile and promised fealty to whatever deity I could think of if I didn’t slide off the back. The valley was a winding two-hour ride away. I spent most of it clinging to Leonard like a koala and desperately pinning my scarf against my face to block the freezing wind. Even with temperatures hovering just above zero degrees, this weather was mild compared with what we could expect in the coming months.
Still, it was a great ride. With the snow nipping at our faces and the scenery flying by, I couldn’t help but grin like a little kid.
We approached the upper ridge of the valley, where we found Maggie’s mate, Nick Thatcher, sitting in a little burrow he’d dug out at the base of a large pine and scribbling into a notebook. Blond, bespectacled Nick could see the entire village from his vantage point, including Maggie’s office at the community center. An avid climber, Nick, I knew, would have preferred to do his scribbling from a tree limb overhead, but Maggie had made her stance on snow-covered-tree climbing pretty clear when he had fallen out of that very tree the previous winter and broken his collarbone. As I’d set the delicate winglike bone, Maggie had bounced between fussing and fretting over his pain and threatening to break several of his other appendages “to match.”
Nick’s cap-covered head snapped up at the sound of the snowmobile’s engine. Residents of the valley were protective of its borders, and the nonwolf residents knew to alert the pack about any unexpected visitors. But when he recognized Leonard’s blue-and-purple flame motif, his even white teeth showed through the golden-blond stubble on his face.
“Len!” he called as Leonard killed the engine. “What’s the news in Grundy? Have you seen Mo lately? How’s she feeling?”
“Got a special delivery for you, Doc,” Leonard shot back.
I snorted. Nick’s PhD was a bit of a stumper for the locals, as they thought they were getting a new MD when he showed up at the Blue Glacier two years before. Even now, I’m not sure our neighbors fully understood the difference between Nick’s various anthropology and folk-studies degrees and my time in medical school.
Nick whooped when I pulled the scarf from my head. “Hey, Anna!” He jumped up from his burrow to throw his arms around me. Halfway through his enthusiastic hug, he seemed to remember that I hadn’t welcomed this sort of casual snuggling during my time in the valley. Before he could retreat, I gave him a little squeeze, making those baby-blue eyes of his crinkle with pleasure.
“I’m so glad you’re back. When you took off like that, you scared a lot of people. Are you OK? Was there some sort of emergency? Maggie’s been beside herself.”
I snorted. “Oh, I’m sure she has.”
Nick’s lips quirked. “No, really, Anna, she’s—well, I don’t want to interfere in pack business. But you need to stop by her office and talk to her.”
“I will, just as soon as I—” I stopped myself, suddenly reluctant to talk about Caleb, just in case he hadn’t returned to the valley after all. “Settle in.”
I saw a faint wince flicker across Nick’s features. “Yeah . . . you need to go see Maggie.”
