Page 81 of Kiss of Wrath

“He’s having a quiet time on a leash out by the shed,” Maggie said.

“He ate Mordr’s underpants and then barfed them up on his shoes,” Linda explained, “an’ I almos’ puked when I saw the pile. It had pickles in it.”

“Mordr made us hose off his shoes,” Larry added. “He said they were his second best boots for goin’ a-Viking.”

“Ahem!” Mordr cleared his throat, but no one heard him over their own chatter. She was used to being ignored when the kids were all excited like this. Mordr was stunned.

Miranda put her forehead on the table, trying to pan out the noise. It was too early in the morning and she didn’t have enough caffeine in her to fortify her for the day to come.

Slowly, she heard silence come over the room. Without any shouting from Mordr, which was her usual way to make the little ones shut up. She raised her head and saw that Mordr just sat, arms folded over his chest, glaring.

The five children, even Maggie and Linda, stared expectantly at Mordr.

“Is this the way you behave when you want something?”

They all ducked their heads.

“Was I being good?” Linda asked tearfully.

“Yes, little mite,” he said, patting her on the head.

“I was being good, too,” Maggie said, indignant that Linda would be the only one complimented.

“You too, Maggie, though you have a habit of telling on others.” Mordr reached over and squeezed Maggie’s hand to soften his criticism.

For a man who abhorred being around children, he was doing a lot of touching today, Miranda noticed.

“Maggie’s a snitch,” Sam declared with disgust.

“Yeah, Maggie’s a snitch,” Ben and Larry echoed.

“What’s a snitch?” Linda wanted to know.

“Mayhap your sister would not snitch if you did not give her reason to,” Mordr said to the boys. “Be nice to her.”

“Huh?” the three of them said as one.

“You can gain more with honey than vinegar. Sweet trumps sour any day,” Mordr went on.

What? Who is this alien talking about sweet talk? Miranda was looking at Mordr, wondering what had come over him suddenly. Not that she didn’t like it.

Time for Miranda to get her two cents in. “What’s this I hear about a big adventure today, Mordr? I don’t recall anyone asking me for permission to take the children on an adventure.” Besides which, they were supposed to be sticking close to, preferably inside, the house until the danger of Roger and/or vampire demons subsided. She felt silly just thinking the words vampire demon. Anyhow, she couldn’t conceive of any big adventure that would take place inside the house.

The kids went blessedly quiet, but she could see their excitement and the fear that they might have put the kibosh on it with all their squabbling.

“I had been thinking of taking you all on a voyage today,” Mordr revealed to Miranda. “With your permission, of course.”

“A-Viking?” three little boys asked hopefully.

“No, not a-Viking. More like a-boating on Lake Mead.”

“Yippee! Speed boating!” Ben did a little Snoopy dance around the kitchen. “Varoom, varoom, varoom!”

“Waterskiing? Oh, man! I always wanted to go waterskiing.” Sam was beaming from ear to ear. “That would be better than five-card stud for a snake any day.”

“I could wear my water wings,” Linda said in a weak voice. Even though she’d had swimming lessons, she probably feared being tossed into the lake, something her brothers might very well do.

“No, it would not be speed boating,” Mordr said, shaking his head at how any comment exploded into a discussion with these kids. “I have rented a pontoon boat for the day.” Realizing his mistake, he immediately turned to Miranda and added, “If you agree.”