Page 85 of Playing By Ear

“Lights are great.” These were soft, at least, and wouldn’t expose his every flaw.

“Good.” Perry drew Jamie to lie down on the bed, then straddled him. “I want to see your face bright and clear.”

A flock of shivers streaked over Jamie’s body at the thought. He’d dreamt of this moment nearly every night for two weeks, but in his dreams he’d always been prone, his face safely hidden. Could he let Perry inside him in more ways than one?

He glanced at the camera sitting on its tripod a few feet below the foot of the bed. Its glassy lens stared back. “The camera’s off, right?”

“Of course.” Perry kissed his neck, just below his ear, starting that run of shivers again. “Would you like to confirm it yourself?”

“No, I trust you.” Besides, a wee part of him wanted to pretend it was on, that the whole world was about to watch. That fantasy was far less scary than the reality of the two of them here, alone, with nothing to come between them, nothing to stop Jamie being truly known.

Perry’s description of his sight loss, as a series of small surrenders followed by a colossal capitulation, was a crystal-clear mirror of Jamie’s feelings. He’d been falling for this man little by little, digging in his heels to slow his descent. But tonight he was tumbling arse over teakettle, shifting in a flash from I like having Perry in my life straight to I can’t bear the thought of losing him.

And like any falling body, once he started, there was no going back.

Perry hadn’t known how much he’d missed real eye contact, a thing others took for granted, a thing he’d taken for granted for nearly thirty years. But lying here beside Jamie, drowning in the deepest blue of his irises, their electric connection seemed to power Perry’s very blood and breath.

Could Jamie feel his hand tremble as it touched so many warm, bare places for the first time? Perry was an earthquake covered in skin.

Now they’d shed their clothes and before they went any further, he had to address the kilt-clad elephant in the room. “Is it strange?” he whispered. “Being with me like this, after watching…”

Jamie gave a laugh that sounded almost relieved. “A bit, if I’m honest. I half-expect to hear Falcon growling at me in his Highland brogue, telling me exactly what I need and how he’s gonnae give it to me.”

“I could try and find him if you want.”

“No, I want you. I want my Perry.” Jamie reached out, his free hand appearing within Perry’s line of sight just before it touched his cheek. “Besides, seeing you onscreen never prepared me for this.” He glided fingertips over Perry’s shoulder, then followed the curves and angles of his chest. “You’re so beautiful, it makes my heart stutter.”

Perry’s words stuck in his throat. He kissed Jamie, as softly as he could bear. Jamie sighed and urged himself closer, slinging one thigh over Perry’s hip. “I cannae wait to feel you in me.”

By reflex, Perry nearly announced he would make Jamie wait, the way Falcon would tease followers to maximize tips. But he had to keep it real, even though real was terrifying. He couldn’t hide behind Falcon forever.

Besides, he didn’t want to wait any more than Jamie did. He wanted to make love to this man who had brought his hazy life into such sharp relief. He wanted him now.

Jamie moved his hand down until it enfolded Perry’s cock in a firm, gentle fist.

Perry groaned. It was such a simple action, yet in Jamie’s hand—the hand that formed chords in such delightful progressions—this simple action was a work of wonder. With one stroke, Perry was fully stiff.

Jamie’s grip loosened, and his fingertips drifted up the shaft, then down, every guitar string–induced callus sending a separate shock wave to the base of Perry’s spine.

He forced himself to pull away before that magical touch could undo him. “Let’s get you ready, shall we?”

“Mmm, we shall.” Jamie rolled onto his back. “I assume you’ve got condoms? Wait, do they even make them extra-extra-extra large?”

“I order mine online.” Perry’s face pulsed with heat. “Not because of—I mean, yes, but it’s because I’m particular.” He opened the bedside table’s top drawer, where he’d placed the box and his favorite lube at the front for easy finding.

He pulled them out, then paused. How long had it been?

“Let me know if you need help,” Jamie said, in a way that didn’t make Perry want to snap I’ve got it! the way it did when others offered.

“It’s not that.” He retrieved a condom and put the box back in the drawer. “I should tell you, it’s been over a year since I’ve done this.”

“Since your ex?”

“Yes, since Nathan.” The name wasn’t what bothered him. “I knew his body by heart by the time I couldn’t see it clearly anymore.” What if he made a mess of this? What if he misread Jamie’s reactions or accidentally hurt him? What if sex pushed them apart instead of bringing them closer?

“If it helps,” Jamie said, “all my bits are in the typical spots.”

And with one cheeky remark, Perry’s doubts melted. “I hope you would’ve mentioned by now if your arsehole was located behind your left knee.”