Page 106 of The Best Thing He Never Wanted

“And I love it.”

She relaxed.

“But that wasn’t the point I was making.”

“No, I know. And you’re right.” She sighed. “I wish we were closer, but I’m afraid she’s rather disapproving.”

“Of you?”

“Yes, of me. But not only of me. Of anything that doesn’t conform to the way she thinks the world ought to be.” She lifted a shoulder. “But honestly, I’d rather not dwell on Rosalind this afternoon. Do you want to tell me about Brooke? You said she’s much younger than you.” She made a face at him. “And you don’t talk about her much, but that certainly doesn’t lead me to the same conclusion. I know you’re very fond of her.”

“I am. She’s an amazing person.”

The waiter returned with their food. Blane’s sea bream looked fantastic, and for a while they concentrated on eating. When he looked up again, Bea was watching him.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Yeah, there’s something. Go ahead and tell me.”

She set down her fork. “I’m not sure I want to. I don’t want to offend you.”

“Don’t think you can.” He studied her. “You’re curious about something. Tell me what it is. I’ll answer if I can.” He considered that for a moment. “And I won’t if I don’t want to. How about that?”

“That sounds fair.” She hesitated. “I was wondering about Brooke. You said she’s so much younger than you, and you were in the Navy for all those years. And your parents died young…”

He sat a little straighter. It didn’t surprise him that she’d put it together. Most people didn’t think to ask, but laid out like that, it was obvious enough.

“She was still a kid when they died.”

Bea held his gaze. She didn’t ask the next question, but he could see it there. With anyone else, he might have been grateful for the silence and left it alone. But he wanted her to understand.

“I didn’t go home.”

She nodded.

“I know now that was a mistake.”

He looked out over the sea, and when Bea reached across the table and took his hand, he curled his fingers around hers.

“I should’ve gone home and been there for her. I can see that now. But it didn’t feel that way at the time. The world was crazy back then. We were on mission after mission. I dodged more than a couple bullets.”

She squeezed his hand. “Even I know enough to see that. Some of those scars tell me you didn’t dodge all of them.”

He nodded. “Nothing too major. But Brooke was devastated when our folks died. They were her whole world, and…” He stared out at the turquoise water for a moment. “I always figured I’d die out there.”

She said nothing.

“I told you there were a bunch of us guys who signed up and served together.”

She nodded. “And you’ve always seen your role as protecting them. Or at least standing guard over them.”

“Yeah. They all had something going on. Something to live for.” He frowned slightly, trying to explain something he’d understood for most of his life without ever thinking he’d have to put it into words. “I never thought of myself the same way. I was the guy watching their backs. That made sense to me.”

He looked down at their joined hands.

“And when our parents died, the last thing I wanted was to become the person Brooke depended on and then go get myself killed.”