Page 58 of Shattered Dreams

“Hey,” I say, nearly breathless. I don’t know if I’ll ever get over these moments—the ones where it hits me just how attractive to me he is. Sometimes I think this—us—is no big deal because it isn’t. He’s still Dre, my best friend I’ve known since college, and I’m still me. But he’s also Dre, the guy I look forward to kissing and cuddling with at the end of the day. He’s also my very fit, very sweet, very attractive boyfriend.

And I honestly can’t say I ever thought I’d say that about anyone, let alone my best friend.

I hang up my keys as he turns towards me.

“Hey.”

I blink, my heart racing as I think about Amelia’s words. It’s not like Dre and I haven’t done things together, in public. We go out in public with the kids all the time. But I also know this—asking him to come with me to my son’s birthday tradition is so much more than just two guys with kids who are friends hanging out. Because I’m not asking my friend.

I’m asking my boyfriend to come with me to my son’s birthday.

“You okay?” he asks, his eyebrows furrowing as I make my way towards the couch. Towards him.

“Yeah.” I clear my throat as I take a seat next to him on the couch.

“Where’s the little princess?”

“Mom swung by to take her to go look for a Halloween costume,” he says with a grin. “I’ve been meaning to take her, and I know you’ve been busy, and—”

“Yeah, of course, no I get it,” I tell him, my nerves kicking up more knots in my stomach because I realize that means I have him all to myself for the time being, and though that should make this easier, it makes me more aware, more tuned in to this irrefutable feeling between us.

Andre glances at my mouth for the briefest moment before meeting my gaze. “They should be a couple of hours.”

There’s a tension between us I can't explain. I know Dre well enough to know if he wants something, if he wants to say something, he won’t hold back. He never has, and honestly, it’s one of the things I love about him.

Love.

I’ve always loved Andre. I still do, in some capacity, but… it just doesn’t feel the same as it used to.

It feels different now. Stronger, maybe? More intense? I don’t know how to describe it, so I don’t try.

He shifts a little closer to me, and I can feel the heat emanating from his freshly showered body. He reaches out and grabs my jaw, his fingers grazing my skin lightly. I fall into his space with ease, as if it’s second nature. Maybe it is.

Maybe I’ve always felt drawn to him, and I just didn’t know why.

Before I can say a word, his lips find mine, and my entire body unravels like thread beneath him. He kisses me slowly, his tongue caressing mine with even strokes, and I don’t hesitate to situate myself in his lap, straddling him as I deepen our kiss. I return the caress of his tongue with mine, grabbing his neck. Dre’s hands rove down my body until his hands find my ass and he squeezes my cheeks with a force that is both aggressive and gentle somehow.

He pushes me against him as he grinds against me from below; the solidness of his erection most evident against my own awakening hardness.

“Dre…” I know we need to talk about this—about my discussion with Amelia—but I also know that these moments—the ones where we’re alone like this, where we can just be and do what feels good, what feels right, are the moments I often find myself looking forward to the most. The ones I think about the most.

“Can I ask you something?” he whispers, one hand moving from my ass over my hip until he finds my erection. Carefully, he palms it through my sweatpants, and I fight the urge to groan and start grinding against his palm.

I should tell him to stop. But I don’t want him to stop touching me, stop kissing me, stop making me feel whatever it is that he makes me feel—like the sky is the limit.

“Anything,” I whisper, my voice tinged with a desperation that should be embarrassing, but…

This is Dre.

There’s nothing I could ever hide from him, nor do I want to.

“You ever think about what it would be like to suck my dick?”

I chuckle nervously, heat flooding my cheeks at the words.

“Um… I mean, sure I’ve thought about it.” I swallow hard. “Why? Have you thought about what it would be like if I sucked your dick?”

Andre laughs, and the sound is sweet and sexy as his fingers dip under my shirt.