Page 63 of Ship of Smoke and Steel

“Where I would have died, if not for you.”

“I—” She grins. “All right. Let’s just agree that we made a good team.”

“Fair enough.” I find myself fighting a grin of my own. I can still see Ahdron’s puzzled face, feel his shudder as I ran him through. I’m still a monster, and my side rotting hurts. But Meroe is smiling at me.

“So what happened with the Butcher and Zarun?” she says. “Why were you fighting Ahdron?”

My grin vanishes. I take a deep breath and explain, as best I can—Zarun’s rescue, and the deal he offered. My counteroffer, and his terms.

“Why?” Meroe says. “What’s so important about being leader of Pack Nine?”

My hands tighten, gripping my trousers. “I wasn’t going to leave you for the Butcher.”

“Oh.” Meroe looks down at the table.

“I didn’t—” I swallow. I keep seeing myself through her eyes, bloodstained and brutal. “I didn’t want it to work out this way. I hoped Ahdron would give in without a fight. I thought—” I shake my head. “Sorry. No excuses.”

“I…” Meroe hesitates. “I can’t say that I liked Ahdron. But I didn’t ask you to kill him for me.”

“I know.” My stomach roils, like I’m about to vomit. “I told you I’m not a good person, Meroe. This is what I do. I hurt people.”

There’s a long pause.

“I don’t blame you,” Meroe says. “I … don’t want people to get hurt. But sometimes there’s no other way. My father told me that, once.” She’s smiling again, a sad smile full of old pain.

“I’m still going to get us both out of here,” I tell her. “Trust me.”

She meets my eye. “I do.”

There’s the sound of footsteps in the corridor outside, and a moment later Zarun enters, with Thora and Jack behind him. He gives a little half bow, blue eyes sparkling.

“Forgive me if I don’t get up,” I tell him.

“Of course,” Zarun says. “You’re the champion of the hour. And it was well fought, I must say. I knew you were tough, but I had no idea you were such an artist.”

I shrug, uncomfortably. “You’ve got what you wanted.”

“I have indeed. The Butcher was kind enough to wager the fate of Pack Nine on the contest, so she has grudgingly agreed to accept my terms. As of now, you are under my protection.” He repeats the bow in Meroe’s direction. “Welcome, Princess.”

“Just ‘Meroe,’” she says, voice guarded. She still doesn’t trust Zarun.

“Of course,” he murmurs, turning back to me. “As pack leader, you’ll be responsible for choosing your own hunts.”

“With your … advice, I imagine.”

“I strive to be helpful, with you being so new.” Zarun smiles. “To that end, Thora and Jack will be joining you.”

Jack is grinning like a lunatic, which seems appropriate for her. “Pledges of eternal loyalty, pack leader!”

“We’ll try to earn our keep,” Thora says, more subdued.

I don’t think any of us doubt for a moment what’s really going on here. Zarun used my challenge to steal Pack Nine from the Butcher, and he needs to protect his investment. Thus he assigns me “subordinates” to serve as minders.

I don’t object. He’s right that I’ll need the help, and if the time comes when we need to move against Zarun I’m sure we can evade them. Or kill them.

“Thank you,” I tell the three of them. “I appreciate the assistance.”

Zarun waves a hand at our surroundings. “The quarters are yours for as long as you want them. And if there’s anything else you need…”