Page 61 of The Christmas Star

I nodded. ‘I’m just thinking.’

We passed a sign for an upcoming aire de repos and clicking on his right indicator, Theo took its slip road and pulled into a parking space. ‘Coffee?’ he asked.

‘Yes, please,’ I replied, more than ready for a caffeine hit.

We both climbed out of the Smart car and while he grabbed Sophia’s basket, I stretched out my back and legs. We made our way to a wooden table and bench and sitting down, Theo did the honours.

‘Pompe à l’Huile?’ he asked.

‘First you’ll have to tell me what that is.’

‘It’s a bread made with olive oil and orange blossom.’ He tore me a piece. ‘Try some.’ While I did as instructed, Theo poured coffee into the two cups Sophia had also been kind enough to provide. ‘It’s a Christmas dessert that symbolises the breaking of bread at the last supper. It hails from Provence, if I remember rightly.’

‘Wherever it comes from, it’s very nice,’ I replied, taking another bite.

I glanced around our surroundings and being Christmas Day, I wasn’t surprised to see we were alone. Other than the road we’d just come off, there was nothing but fields as far as the eye could see. The air was cold but there wasn’t a cloud in sight and angling my face to the sun, I closed my eyes, enjoying the warmth of its distant rays. I smiled at the aroma of the hot coffee Theo placed in front of me. ‘I could get used to this,’ I said.

Theo sat down opposite.

I wrapped my hands around my cup, happy to continue basking in the sunshine. ‘I bet it’s not like this in Settledown.’

Theo chuckled, no doubt, like me imagining nothing but grey, thanks to non-stop heavy rain.

Sitting there in the quiet, I felt like a hypocrite. There I’d been, telling Mum she needed to get out more; all the while wittering on about Maple Manor because anything was better than shutting herself away from the rest of the world. In my arrogance, I’d completely ignored the fact that I, too, had disengaged. That my life was just as small and monotonous.

At least Mum had been brave and stepped out of her comfort zone. She’d chosen to get behind the wheel of a car and travel to France; unlike me who’d been forced into it. Instead of complaining, I should’ve been celebrating Mum’s achievements and thanking her for sandbagging me into giving chase.

But none of that explained where her travel companion fit it.

‘Tell me about Jackson,’ I said.

Theo’s eyes lit up at the mere mention of his son. ‘He’s bright, handsome like his dad, of course.’

‘That goes without saying.’

‘Shy and a bit of a loner. Although he wasn’t always that way. Once of a day he could talk to anyone. He was a real social butterfly.’

‘Really?’ I found that hard to imagine.

Theo drank a mouthful of coffee and staring at me for a moment, took a deep breath and exhaled. ‘Sasha, his mum, she passed away,’ he said. ‘A couple of years ago.’

My stomach lurched and horrified, my heart went out to Jackson.

‘Cancer. Jackson took it hard, of course. If I’m honest we both did. But him especially.’

I pictured Jackson with his overgrown fringe and immediately felt ashamed of myself. No wonder he hid behind it. He probably didn’t want the world to see he was hurting. I might not have had children, but I knew firsthand the pain of losing a parent. It didn’t matter that Dad was in his eighties when he passed. Or that he’d lived a full life. The grief hit hard, and I was a middle-aged woman. At his tender age, goodness knew the level of pain Jackson was experiencing. Both he and his Mum deserved better.

‘It wasn’t long after the funeral he started skipping school and his grades slipped. He’s a good kid, but he wasn’t just grieving, he was angry. Then he started getting in with the wrong crowd.’

‘Hence, the move to Settledown?’

Theo played with his hands. ‘I thought with time and distance… you know.’ He looked at me direct. ‘One thing I didn’t bank on, was him doing a runner with Maeve.’

Theo’s accompanying laugh wasn’t fooling anyone. It was hollow, masking the pain he, too, felt. Watching the mother of his child through her final journey had to have been unbearable and I could only imagine how difficult it was to have to pick up the pieces and be strong for his son.

‘Although if I’m honest, I’m glad he did. Maeve’s good for Jackson. Whether it’s because they each understand what the other has been through or because they’re both just irresponsible, I really don’t care. I haven’t seen Jackson smile like he is in those TikTok videos for a long time.’

I couldn’t deny I’d thought the same about Mum.