Page 83 of Knot A Chance

She must have been close because she rounded the corner and flew into the room a second later, Dr. Tanaka by her side. “He’s waking up,” Dr. Tanaka said. “We need to extubate him now.”

She and Carissa moved to the head of Felix’s bed and worked to remove the long breathing tube from his throat. He coughed and sputtered through the process, my heart aching.

I brought his hand to my face and scented his wrist, licking his scent gland soothingly while they worked.

They blurred before me as they helped him, my tear-filled eyes unable to look away from the bonding mark I’d placed on his neck. It had been easy to feel certain it was the right decision when the stakes had been what they were, but it would be another thing entirely to feel confident when the love of my life looked at me with disappointment and I had to confess that I’d bonded him without his consent.

The one and only thing he’d ever asked me not to do.

Felix gasped as the tube was finally pulled from his throat, his eyes wide open and searching. He looked between Carissa and Dr. Tanaka, panic lacing his features.

I reached for him through the bond to calm him and reassure him again, but the panic at what I’d done to him was consuming me and finding calm energy to share with him was scarce.

“It’s okay,” Carissa said, patting his hand. “Your alpha is right here. Here’s been here the whole time.”

I squeezed Felix’s hand, and when his eyes found mine, he burst into tears. He opened his mouth to speak but a scratchy sound came out.

I turned to Dr. Tanaka.

“That’s normal after an intubation,” she said. “It may be hard for him to talk for a few days.”

“It’s okay, baby,” I said, brushing hair of his forehead. “Don’t speak for now. I’m not going anywhere.”

Felix reached across his body with his free hand and weakly gripped the front of my shirt. I bent down, trying to follow what he wanted and placed my ear over his mouth. “Thank you,” he whispered in a scratchy voice.

“Sounds like consent to me,” Carissa whispered to Dr. Tanaka.

Dr. Tanaka nodded. “Less paperwork.” She shrugged, smiling at me.

I choked on a sob and wrapped my arms around Felix’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry,” I cried.

He shook his head and lifted his fingers to our bonding mark on the left side of his neck and gave me a weak smile. “I choose to be yours,” he croaked.

The weight crushing my chest finally released itself and I yanked at the blanket on top of him as I looked at Carissa. “Can I?”

She nodded. “Your presence will do more to provide him comfort than anything we can do for him right now. We’ll give you some time alone before we start running scans and checking on his condition. The fact that he seems aware is a very good sign, Bennett. Congratulations.”

She’d hardly finished speaking before I’d climbed into the bed and pulled Felix against my chest. As soon as I was settled, Felix fisted my shirt in both hands and curled against me. I kissed the top of his head, feeling his body shake with sobs. “It’s okay, baby,” I said, surrounding us in soothing pheromones.

“I heard everything,” he whispered between gasps for air. “I was so afraid you wouldn’t do it. I wanted you to do it.”

I closed my eyes, my tears falling on his head, and I pressed my lips to his forehead, afraid to let go. “You’re not mad?” I asked, tipping his chin to meet my gaze.

He smiled, still weak, but certain. “Not a chance, Bennett. I’m so happy to be bonded to you.”

I kissed him softly. “I love you so much,” I said against his lips. “I can’t ever go through this again.”

He scented my neck gingerly. “Can I bite you?”

“What?” I asked. “No, you need to rest.”

“I want you to have a mark from me too,” he said in another scratchy whisper.

“I will. When we get out of this hospital, you can mark me as many times as you want,” I said, rubbing his back as he settled for licking my scent gland instead. “You need to rest your throat too.”

“I can feel your love for me,” he said. “It’s even more than I imagined.”

“I can feel yours too,” I said. “It’s everything.”