Page 95 of The Forbidden Fling

“I have somewhere to be,” Diana lied, keeping her expression neutral. If there was to be one final power play between them, there was no chance she was going to surrender.

“A woman in high demand.” Selena clicked her tongue, letting the silence stretch. Her gaze lingered, dripping down Diana’s cleavage. “I’ve always admired that.”

Diana kept her voice firm. “That’s understandable.”

Selena cracked a smile at her response, revealing perfect, straight teeth. She adjusted her thin gold-framed glasses. “I knew you’d make this difficult for me, but I suppose that’s part of your charm.” She took another step forward. “I was hoping we could leave things on better terms. It’s no secret that I’ve enjoyed our rivalry over the years. It brings out the best in us, wouldn’t you agree? Nothing quite like some healthy competition to keep bettering ourselves.” She tilted her head when Diana didn’t respond. “You’re a powerful woman, Diana. I like that. If you find yourself with any time in your busy schedule before you leave tomorrow, you should pay me a visit.” With the confidence of someone who’d just secured a million-pound grant, she placed a kiss on each of Diana’s cheeks and turned, her hips swaying back down the hallway.

Diana could only watch her, wondering what on earth just happened.

* * *

When Diana finally made it into the comfort of a hotel room the next day, she let out a sigh, dumping her suitcases by the door. Not only had her flight been delayed, but she’d had to spend the journey next to a man who thought he had the right to both armrests and snored like a nasally grizzly bear. Normally, she enjoyed travelling. She blamed the lack of sleep for her discomfort, worrying if she was making the right decision—to return to England, that is, not whether or not to hate-fuck Selena.

The idea of releasing some of her frustration and sadness was tempting, but the reality of touching someone? Someone who wasn’t her? She needed no time to think about that. The answer was obvious, even in her fragile state.

What she’d shared with Faye wasn’t easily replaceable. It had started off as sex, yes, as a curiosity, to see if Diana could loosen up, but it had morphed into something much more than that long before she had the guts to admit it.

These terrible three months apart were telling enough in themselves. Plus, the giant ache in her chest whenever she allowed herself to think about her. Of course the ache multiplied with the absence of her daughter too. She’d exchanged a few words with Molly, called her dozens of times, but the message was clear, still sitting in their inbox as her last response.

Leave me alone.

So she had. For six long, agonising weeks. She’d given her space, hoping that would help, but she also dreaded whatever sewage Jason was no doubt filling her head with in the meantime. She’d handled the situation all wrong.

She’d talked at length about it with a therapist, Dr Andrews, who she’d started seeing after her return from Sandy Springs. Turns out it wasn’t just the emotional baggage from her mother’s death she was carrying, it was a whole bus full of unresolved issues. Her divorce, her relationship with her dad, and her avoidance tactics for most things that went wrong in her life. All that time she’d spent running away from her problems now felt like a waste. What was she so afraid of?

Maybe having everything and losing it in the blink of an eye. Or with a kiss on the lips.

She’d strengthened her relationship with Molly and had the possibility of starting something real with Faye. Then just like that, both were gone.

Needing to think about anything else, she pulled out her phone and checked her messages. She sent a text to Leanne, who replied in seconds.

Leanne: Glad you’re back on home soil. I’ll be in London next month, so let’s get dressed up and go for cocktails

How’s things?

Diana: Absolutely, thank you, you’re a gem

And no update, still radio silence

Leanne: Give it time. Have a little faith. I’m sure Molly will come round

Diana: What if she doesn’t?

She watched the dots bounce.

Leanne: She will. You need to stop beating yourself up. You’re only human

That hadn’t exactly been her friend’s response when she’d initially told her what happened—what the hell were you thinking, Di?—but she couldn’t blame her. Diana could hardly believe it had happened herself.

She shot her ex-agent a reply, thanking her, then lay back on her bed, looking up at the clean white ceiling.

At least she and Faye had those wonderful three weeks on the island. She wished she could say that was enough, but the lie wouldn’t stick.

Why hadn’t she reached out sooner? Why hadn’t she shared a bed with Faye? Regrets drip-fed into her brain until they pooled around her. She’d never hold Faye as night thinned into daylight, never feel the way sleep softened her in her arms. There were so many things she would never do and never say.

Faye had said once, “Don’t let me be something you regret.” But the regrets continued to rise, flooding the hotel room until she couldn’t breathe.

She forced her body upright, remembering the grounding techniques Dr Andrews gave her to calm her racing heart. She searched for senses. The twinkling city lights through the window. The hum of traffic below. Breathing in deep, she held it for a second before releasing. The soft hotel bedsheets.