Page 75 of Before the Encore

Madison crossed her arms behind her head, naked and completely gorgeous. Bonnie couldn’t help but admire every hard line and contour of muscle. She raised an eyebrow when Bonnie ogled her too long.

“Come on.” Bonnie snapped out of it and threw Madison’s bra at her. “We really need to go.”

Madison blew a raspberry and sat up, pulling her bra over her head. Then she shrugged on her shirt and dragged a hand through her hair. “About earlier. Are we, you know. Is this…uh.”

Bonnie’s heart squeezed. “You’re adorable when you’re nervous.”

Madison scoffed. “I’m not nervous. I’m just not great at this stuff.”

Bonnie cupped Madison’s cheek, her thumb smoothing over the pink blooming through. Madison’s gaze flicked to hers, steadying her despite the flood of emotions swirling in her chest. She swallowed. “Do you really want this, Madison?”

“Yeah.”

“Really? The Madison Moore, at the top of her game, wants to be with me?”

“This isn’t a game to me.” Madison frowned, pulling away. “People always assume I’m in relationships for fun and nothing long term, but it’s usually the other way around. Because I dress like this and it’s who the media wants me to be, no one gives me a chance to be anything else.” Those blue eyes found hers. “Including you.”

Bonnie blinked, thrown off by Madison’s honesty. Madison stood and picked her jeans off the floor, shoving her legs inside.

“The whole time we’ve had this agreement”—Madison tugged her trousers up, aggressively buttoning the top—“I’ve done everything you asked. Sat quiet in interviews, posed for pictures, kept ‘my beaver dammed’ as Bailey had once lovingly put it. Have I ever given you a reason to doubt me?”

“Don’t act like you did all of that for altruistic purposes, Madison. You did it for yourself, too. For your band.”

“Of course I did. But I also—” Madison gritted her teeth and threw up her hands. “I also did it because I like you.”

Bonnie’s heart jumped into her throat, the words echoing around her.

Madison softened, her voice reducing to a low rumble. “I know I’m messy and loud and I get carried away sometimes, but I don’t want to be messed around.” She raked a hand through her hair, then her burning gaze flicked to Bonnie. “I don’t think the question is whether I really want this…but do you?”

Bonnie’s heart thumped hard against her ribcage, fear pinning her by the throat. She’d spent so long in the spotlight, being blinded by people who took advantage and trusting the wrong people, she’d stopped putting herself out there at all. She’d stopped trusting people, full stop.

But pulling away didn’t stop the fear. It rose in her regardless, winding its way around everything she was worried to lose.

Even things that weren’t hers.

“Be honest with me.” Madison’s throat bobbed, her jaw tightening. “I can take it.”

What did Katy say? Stay true to yourself and follow your heart. She gathered the fear and squeezed, squashing it into something manageable. She just hoped she wouldn’t vomit.

“I’m sorry. You’re right. Everything you said about me was right. I’ve been pushing you away, acting like it was you that was indecisive. But it was me. I am afraid.” Tears pricked the back of her eyelids; Madison stepped towards her. “I’m afraid of how you make me feel. Powerful. Reckless. Alive. But I’m also afraid of how I’ll feel when you’re not around.” She swallowed. “I don’t want to get my heart broken.”

“I don’t either.”

“The odds are stacked against us.”

“They are against everyone,” Madison argued, her hands finding Bonnie’s waist. “You can’t write us off before we’ve even started. I bet when you first met me, you’d never have predicted we’d be here.”

Bonnie laughed, remembering the arrogant woman in Bailey’s office. “Not a chance.” Pieces slotted into place, and Bonnie suddenly understood. All of Madison’s bravado, her cockiness—it was a shield to protect herself. Something they both did, but admittedly, in different ways.

Bonnie’s smile faltered. “What about the distance?”

“The next few months will be tricky. We’ll both be busy with our new albums, but as soon as we’re done recording, I’ll come to LA.”

Hope dared to flicker, brightening her. “Really?”

Madison cupped her face with cool and coarse fingers. “If that’s what you want.”

“Maybe I’ll come back here.”