Page 63 of Off Sides

Later, when we go to bed—Calvin has pretty much just moved into my room. And while it may be unconventional, Jenna and Micah don’t seem to worry about it in the slightest. We’re both adults after all, and they’re all too happy to help.

We lie in my bed, both trying to drift off to sleep because morning will come way too soon. But I can’t help but pushing just a little bit to see what he has planned for the future. “So, if college were an option . . .” I start.

And I hear his laughter as he rolls to his side to face me. “I’m thinking about it. Coach said he’ll talk to the school counselor. Try to see if it’s a possibility.”

“Really?” I ask, surprised that this is so easy.

“I don’t think it is. But maybe.”

I smile because I have no doubt it is. I won’t push too much—and I’ll resist calling up the coach at Manhattan City University who recruited me and putting the ultimatum on the table—at least for a bit. If it comes to that, I have no shame.

“What do you want to do after college?” I ask, and he rolls back onto his back, tucking an arm under his head.

“You’ll laugh.”

“Try me,” I say because maybe—but not in a mean way.

“I don’t know. I always kind of liked science in school. The one class I actually have a B in.”

“You want to be a scientist?” I manage not to laugh, but I can’t say that doesn’t surprise me. I’m on board for anything but didn’t see that coming.

His shoulders actually shake with laughter, and I can make out his head shaking no in the dark room. “Hell no. I just . . . well, maybe I’d want . . .”

“Spit it out,” I tease. “I have to know now.”

He huffs. “Fine. I was thinking maybe a science teacher. Maybe a football coach on the side. Like elementary.”

I’m not laughing at all now. “Ohhh, I can see that,” I say honestly. “I can really see that.”

“Yeah?” I love how innocent and sweet he sounds, totally in awe of me being serious about seeing him as an elementary schoolteacher, teaching science to little kids and then coaching them after school.

“Yeah,” I say. “Yeah, I can see all.”

“And what about you? What’s in your future?” he asks, moving closer to me and kissing me softly.

“You. One hundred percent—you.”

He chuckles and kisses me hard but then pulls back just a little. “Seriously, though. What after college?”

“Whatever we want. I’d love to play professionally, but I’d be just as fine coaching.”

“Wanna take over for your brother?” he asks, his voice sounding like a smile.

“Or coach alongside him,” I say.

“Yeah, I can see that,” he repeats my words, and we both lay there silently for a minute before I turn on my side to look at him, propping my head up on my hand.

“You know what I’ve been thinking about doing a lot lately?”

“Is there anything left we haven’t done?” he asks with a playful, sly grin, leaning in to kiss my lips again.

I laugh and then put a hand on his chest, pushing him back. “Oh, I’m sure we can come up with lots more to do, but I meant something else. Probably not nearly as satisfying, but maybe.”

“What’s that?” he asks, all ears now.

“I want to drive that stupid truck down to Texas. Park it in the yard and throw the keys at the front door. And never go back,” I say more intensely than I mean to because I realize how badly I want this.

Calvin got his closure. That truck is like a weight pulling me down, reminding me of my father’s hatred. I don’t want it anymore. I don’t need it.