Page 60 of The Honor Society

Debt Owed: Academic intervention, donor complaint suppressed. Tenure protected.

Outstanding balance: One favor

Interest Accrued: Three ignored summons. One unauthorized disclosure.

Collection: Access credentials to University Archive.

Status: Due September 17th.

“Today.” She finishes. “Wow, wow, wow, Proctor, so you’re basically going to scare some cute old professor shitless over a password? Batman you are not.”

I smile behind the mask. Bullshit. I could be Batman. “It’s a very important password, Famine.”

“Okay evil IT, just don’t get blood on his suede jacket, I heard he collects them and has two Pomeranian dogs that he enters into dog shows.”

I slam on the breaks. “Seriously?”

“I’m totally screwing with you, I have no clue. He’s never been any of my professors but your voice sounded almost guilty behind that little modulator. What? Pet lovers get a free pass? Did I mention I love sloths?”

I grunt. “Probably because you live like one.”

“Axel used to say that.” Fuck, was she baiting me? “That sloth was my spirit animal because I kept more clothes on the floor than in the closet.”

“Smart man. I did him a favor.” I need to change the subject. I turn into the University parking lot when she sighs and stares down at her phone. “What?”

“You think he still loves me? Or that he’d take me back even knowing your tongue was down my throat a day ago?”

“A man who can’t forgive isn’t a man worth loving.” I snap. “Stay here.”

“Nope.” She jerks The Ledger away from me. “I’m your partner in crime now. There is no getting rid of me, plus if people see your mask I’ll say you’re cosplaying.”

“What? The plague?” I chuckle. “And trust me. I know how to get into places without being seen. We’ll take the back door to his office through the alleyway.”

“Like all supervillains. Awesome.” Charlie says in a dry tone.

She’s spunky today and if she keeps talking I’m going to eventually give myself away. I let her follow me down the alleyway and when I find the door I try the knob, it turns, no kicking the door in necessary. I stroll down the hall and take the first right into his office.

He’s sitting there exactly where he should be on a Wednesday. Office door wide open for his office hours—I quickly shut it closed behind me and pull the blinds down. Charlie takes a seat.

“Are you a new student?” He smiles at her.

“And me? What do I look like?” I ask. It comes out more like a growl through the voice modulator. Professor Ellison or Martin, grabs his chest. Be serious. I’m not that terrifying. “Martin, I’m going to need a bit of cheerful cooperation today.”

“P-proctor.” He points at me. “I meant to come, those last two times but I thought, it was such a small insignificant debt, I didn’t really think⁠—”

“—no,” I pick up one of his pencils then snap it in half with my left hand dropping the pieces onto his desk. “You didn’t think. You’re very book smart, Martin, but when it comes to the real world when you owe a debt, it will be collected, ignoring the problem makes it grow, yes?”

“Yes.” Sweat pours down his face and suddenly I’m imagining two Pomeranian show dogs and a closet full of brown suede jackets. I could strangle Charlie. Instead, I turn my irritation towards poor Martin. “The password and I’ll wipe the debt clean.”

He looks at Charlie, then at me. “I, uh, I have it written down, I change it every three days.”

Is he serious? “Then kindly find the pathetic piece of paper you’ve stained with your handwriting and give it to me.” I don’t want to hurt him but he’s trying my patience in ways he’ll never understand, especially with Charlie standing right there watching.

He turns and starts digging through his papers and files, then pulls out a pink sticky note. “This one, it’s this one.” He holds his hand out then jerks it back. “Wait, no, I remember writing on blue.”

“A wonder you remember anything at all.” I grit my teeth and flick open my knife.

“Blue!” He wails, "it was blue." He digs again and comes back with a blue sticky note. I glance down at the password. “Sexymermaidsrfun2.” You’ve got to be shitting me.