Page 48 of Snowed In with the Jilted Duke

“Spring ‘em, Robbie!” Oliver roared, and the carriage lurched forward.

Pippa sat huddled on the seat, humiliation rising in her again. The family had seen it! They had seen the whole drama. And not one of them had intervened. They had even applauded it!

She shivered, and Oliver dropped a wool blanket around her shoulders. “I have your cloak here as well.”

“No, thank you.”

“Would you prefer to freeze?”

Sunk deep in her anger, Pippa considered it. She really did. If she caught pneumonia and died, that would show him her anger was not to be trifled with.

But a racking shiver demonstrated her body was not nearly as stubborn as her mind, and Oliver sighed.

“For God’s sake, Pippa.” Firmly, he took away the blanket that she clutched to her throat and moved to sit next to her, tucking the cloak around her before topping it with the blanket. She shivered again and, with a sigh, he hoisted her into his lap. She sat stiffly, refusing to relax against him no matter how much her traitorous body wanted to.

“I hate you,” she said.

He nuzzled her hair with his chin. “I know. Try to get some sleep.”

She would not sleep.

Her head began to droop towards his shoulder. So wide and inviting after her sleepless nights.

She refused to sleep.

Her cheek rested on the wool of his greatcoat now, the motion of the carriage rocking her like a cradle. Oliver tightened his arms around her, and she relaxed into his warmth against her will.

“Sleep now, pigeon,” he murmured, and she felt his lips brush her forehead as her eyes closed, lulled into a doze at last.

Oliver held her tightly as she slept, afraid to let her go. If he let her go, she might elude him entirely, the way she had eluded him in his dreams.

He knew he had hurt her. He had never wanted to hurt her. He must find a way to help her see herself as he did, see how much more suited she was to be his wife and his duchess than her sister had ever been.

The very thought made his chest ache as though his heart was being squeezed by a giant hand, but if it was a choice between making Pippa miserable with his presence or letting her go… he would let her go. No matter how painful it would be. No matter how difficult his finances would be. It would be worse to know she was unhappy with him.

Pippa woke slowly, feeling warm and cozy until she realized she was still in Oliver’s arms inside the moving coach. She thrust away from him and backed into a corner of the seat, clutching the cloak and blanket around herself like a shield.

He only shook his head at her. “You may as well wrap yourself up properly.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Pippa rearranged the cloak and blanket, wrapping the cloak around herself before spreading the blanket across her lap. “You cannot force me to marry you.”

“I shall not force you. If we arrive in Gretna and you are still opposed to marrying me, I will… let you go.”

Even through her anger, she could hear the pain in his voice, and tears threatened to start in her eyes. She thought of the Kilmartins, and the servants, and everyone who depended upon Oliver. Everyone who needed the money that only she or Penny would bring.

“They only liked me because I was pretending to be Penny,” she said.

“Pippa, no.” He reached out to her, and she shrank back into her corner. “That’s not true. You were not acting like Penelope does at all. You were acting like… yourself. The way I remember you before your sister’s illness.”

She scoffed and turned her head away. “You never paid any attention to me before Penny got sick.”

Oliver was quiet for a long moment. “You must understand, Pippa. I was promised to your sister when I was fifteen years old. It never occurred to me that I could make a different choice. But I always… I always liked you. I always enjoyed talking to you. And I missed you when you stopped speaking to me after your sister became ill.”

“It was my fault. It was all my fault.” The tears could not be held back any longer. “She almost died because I was jealous of her. Because I wanted you. That’s why she almost died. And she still might.”

Somehow, she found herself back in Oliver’s arms, with him trying to soothe her. She did not even know if he had understood her words, as choked by sobs as they had been.

“Pippa,” he said softly, “unless you are secretly a witch, I doubt you cursed your sister.”