Page 215 of Pumpkin Spice Promises

“No.”

“Why?”

His expression was almost amused. “Because you’re a grown woman and Blueberry’s your horse.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Do you want to?”

I looked at the saddle. That was a different question. For years, I’d asked whether I could. Whether my balance would allow it. Whether the prosthetic would cooperate. Whether I could learn new cues. Whether I’d ever barrel race again.

Beau hadn’t asked any of those things.

Did I want to ride?

I closed my eyes. “Yes.” When I opened them, he was still there. “I think I do.”

“Okay.”

Fear moved immediately through me. “That’s all you’re saying?”

“You seem disappointed.”

“I’m used to people having a lot more…opinions.”

“I have plenty. But none of them matter unless you want them.”

I stared at Blueberry. “What if I get up there and freak out?”

“Then you get down.”

“What if I can’t do it?”

“Then you don’t.”

“What if I can?”

Beau smiled. “Guess we’ll find out.”

We waited until after everyone left. I almost changed my mind six times. Beau didn’t mention any of them. He carried the mounting block into the arena because I asked him to. He checked the saddle because I asked him to. He held Blueberry steady because I asked him to.

By the time I stood beside her, my hands were trembling badly enough that I struggled with the reins.

Blueberry turned her head. Her dark eyes found me.

“I’m fine,” I whispered to her muzzle.

Beau leaned against the fence. “Didn’t say anything.”

“I was talking to her.”

“Sure.”

I glared at him.

The arena smelled like dirt and leather and the faint sweetness of hay drifting from the barn. For most of my childhood, this had been the safest place in the world. Now my heart was trying to break through my ribs. I positioned the mounting block beside Blueberry. My body knew the sequence.

That was almost the worst part.