Page 25 of Dancing in the Dark

“Oh… okay. Alright.” I slump back in my chair and wheeze through the panic in my lungs. “That’s good. What’s up? I thought you had some bigwigs coming in from China today?”

I know you did. I saw you on the news, Sera! And you were so fucking beautiful.

“Uh huh. The Chinese delegates are here.” Phones ring on her end of the line. Politicians chatter. Fancy people in fancy suits surround her. Is Markum still there? “It’s gone really well so far. However, I’ve found myself with an unexpected few hours off.”

“Oh…?” And you want to spend them with me? “Really?”

“Yeah. Our schedule has changed at the last minute, which is kind of annoying,” she exhales a breathy snicker. “I put a lot of work into this event, but whatever. We’ll pick up tomorrow where we left off today. In the meantime, my afternoon and evening are free.”

“And…?” You want to spend them with me?

“I was calling to ask if I could pick Mia up from school.”

Mercy! Ouch! Oh, God, it hurts. “Right. Of course.” Clearing my throat, I peel my eyes open and meet Arch’s curious stare. Can he read my mind? Does her rejection show on my face? “You wanna pick Mia up?”

“I-if that’s okay? If you have other plans, then that’s fine. I don’t want to step on toes. I just thought…” And there it goes, the bubbling confidence she started with, to a stammering, shy woman. I did that. “I’ve been thinking about her all day, that’s all.” Her words crackle with insecurity. “I didn’t get to talk to her very much on Sunday night, so I thought she might like a girl’s afternoon, but if you’d prefer I didn’t, that’s⁠—”

“No, it’s fine.” I scrub my hand over my face and swallow my groan. Calm down, you fucking idiot. Loving a woman who hates me and loves my child is a million times better than loving one who wants my undivided attention and can’t stand kids. “It’s okay.”

“Really?” An uncharacteristic, yelping squeak of excitement escapes her throat. “Are you sure?”

“Uh huh.” I lower my hand. “I’m sure.”

“I know I’ve put you on the spot. I would’ve called sooner and given you more time to consider, but I only found out about my freedom ten minutes ago.”

“It took you ten whole minutes to remember my baby?”

She scoffs. “No. It took me ten minutes to work up the courage to make this phone call.” She silences for a beat, hesitant, before adding, “Are you sure it’s okay?”

“I’m sure.” I spy the time in the bottom corner of my computer screen. “I was getting ready to leave soon anyway, so if you want to make it in time, you’ll probably have to go now. Does that work for you?”

“Yep!” Already, her heels click, click, click across the tile inside her office building. “I’m headed to the elevators now. I’ll be at her school before three. And Charlie?”

I love her. I fucking bleed for her. And though I don’t begrudge my daughter’s good fortune, there’s a definite slice of my soul bitterly jealous that I don’t get to experience what she does.

For both of their sakes, I slap on a smile and play my part. “Mm?”

“Thank you.” She exhales a relieved sigh. “I know it’s all a bit strange. Like we’re co-parenting, and the world’s sweetest little girl has been caught in the middle. But I promise, I only want to be good for her. She deserves to smile every single day. I just want to be the reason for a few of them.”

“It’s okay. And you are.” I inhale until my lungs expand and my chest grows. Then I let it out again, and with it, my disappointment. Ish. Not really. But I can pretend. “You’re the reason for at least seventy percent of her smiles. You don’t owe her anything, Sera, but you’re stepping up anyway, and because of it, my baby has a whole other special person in her life. Someone she can trust and love without reservation. I appreciate that. So thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” The ding of an elevator tells me exactly where she is, so I watch her in my mind, exiting onto lobby tiles and marching her way toward the front doors. “I’ll keep her for a couple of hours and bring her back whenever you want her. If you’re working or whatever, let me know when to expect you home. Just…” Fuck, I see her shrugging in my mind. “Communicate. That’s all I ask.”

“Okay.” I swallow the nasty lump of nerves nestled in my throat before it causes my voice to crack. “I will. I’ll text you later and let you know what’s happening.”

“Great!” I know the instant she steps outside and onto City Hall’s front steps. The sounds change. The air changes. “I’ll see you when I see you. If you’re out later than, say, six o’clock, I’ll make sure she’s had dinner, too.”

“Alright. And Sera?” I run my hand through my hair, scratching my scalp rather than vocalizing all the wildly toxic, jealous, ridiculous shit bouncing through my mind. “Are you still there?”

“Mmhm. What’s up?”

I love you! Won’t you please love me back?

“I hope you girls have a really great time. Soak up all those hugs. Mia gives the best kind.”

She exhales a happy sigh. “I know she does. See you in a little while.”

She kills our call, so the noisy chatter of an active homicide division replaces that of traffic and downtown Copeland City.