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Just like that man wouldn’t leave a lasting impression, either.

He was gone.

Forgotten already.

But I knew that couldn’t be true. He could’ve had a wife. A family. At the very least, he probably had a landlord or a boss or⁠—

Stop.

I hurried into my room, both to get away from the spot and the memories of a human’s neck being broken.

Don’t make him the victim.

He was here to kill you. Or Brady.

I reached my room and closed the door behind me. Sagging against it, I let the fatigue of the night take over me.

Nikolai had worn me out. Twice. And while I wished I could’ve just stayed in his big bed with him, nestled against his body heat, I hadn’t. Mostly, I wanted to avoid Brady waking up and finding me missing from my room. Letting him panic was never ideal. But just in case he could’ve looked in Nikolai’s room for me, then find me with him…

Yeah, that’s going to be something else to figure out.

How I could tell him about me and Nikolai was another mystery. He’d never known me to have a man in my life. No boyfriends or lovers. But he was aware of women and men being together. Like Mrs. Richards and her afternoon affairs while I watched her sons.

I hadn’t given much time to considering how I would ever explain to him that I was interested in a man. That was another sign of how much my son was the number-one priority in my life. But that didn’t mean I had to deny myself.

I didn’t deny myself last night…

I smiled as I showered and got ready for the day.

Brady woke up shortly after I was ready to leave my room. “Morning, Mama!” Like usual, he was a bundle of joy.

We met Paloma for breakfast, and she preoccupied us both with waffles and eggs and bacon. Nikolai had already texted me while I slept in that he was out with Adrik, handling Bratva business, and I knew better than to ask any questions. His checking in with me was sweet, anyway. It wasn’t like he owed me answers and tips about his whereabouts.

Later, when he returned, his hands bloody and a new mark on his cheek, I grimaced at the signs of violence he’d taken during this “Bratva business”. He came back with Lev and Alexei, and all three of them were arguing about how a Konstantin had done something wrong.

“I don’t want to know,” I muttered to myself. “I don’t want to know…” I continued gathering the coloring books and crayons from when Brady was coloring before he went out with Paloma to splash in the little pool.

“You sound like Elena.”

I glanced up at Mila entering the room. She smiled slightly, clearly hearing my mumbling. I smiled and shrugged. “I don’t, though.”

She raised her brows, here to drive Lev back home, I thought. Crossing her arms as she watched me tidy the table, she smirked. “But you’re not clueless. You’re not naïve.”

I shook my head. “No. I’m not.”

“You saw him handle the assassins at your apartment. You can’t claim ignorance of what he does and what he’s capable of.”

I sighed, hugging the coloring books. “I know. Plus, the man from last night.”

She raised her brows. “Someone got in here?”

“He did. And Nik didn’t hesitate to…” I flapped my hand as a gesture to convey what I didn’t want to say.

“Ah.” She tilted her head to the side. “And you’re struggling with that?”

I nodded. “I’ve been grappling with the fact that I could be starting to fall for a man whose life is steeped in violence.” Realizing that she wanted to offer herself as another sounding board, I dropped into a chair. She did the same, giving me that same careful but patient look.

“Falling for him?” The barest hint of a smile crossed her face. “That fast?”