Page 50 of Commander’s Mate

That made me cry harder.

Because he stopped.

Because he listened.

Because he was not the enemy, and I needed someone to be.

“It is her choice,” he said to Scarlet, though his eyes stayed on me.

Scarlet looked at me.

I hated needing him. Hated that his arms had already become a place my body remembered as safe after one conversation and one kiss.

I stepped forward.

Zared opened his arms only after I moved.

Then I was against him, face pressed to his chest, and I sobbed like something inside me had finally accepted that rescue was not the same as return.

His arms closed around me.

Holding. Not trapping.

Across the room Zoe started crying. Nora sat beside her. Scarlet drew them both close. Kyanna turned away, shoulders shaking.

“I am sorry,” Zared said near my ear.

“I hate this.”

“I know.”

“No, you don’t.”

His hand stilled. “No. Not as you do.”

I cried harder because he did not pretend.

Eventually the sobs faded into shudders. I had soaked the front of his uniform. He did not seem to care.

“Do you want me to release you?” he asked.

“No.”

His arms remained around me without tightening.

“I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Neither do I.”

I gave a wet, broken laugh. “You’re the commander.”

“About troop movement and weapons, yes. About how to comfort a woman whose world was stolen, no.”

“You’re doing okay.”

Scarlet’s voice came from behind us. “What happens now?”

Zared lifted his head.