Page 80 of The Chase

“Have you seen someone before? After the accident?”

I shook my head.

“Did something make you want to talk to me today?”

“My boyfriend. I wake up screaming at night, and he’s worried about me. He wants me to get better, but I don’t know how.”

“The fact you came here today is a big step. It’s okay to admit when you need help, and that’s what I’m here for.” She set her notepad and pen down again and crossed her legs. “Tell me about your boyfriend.”

“He’s not what I expected. He’s a professional athlete; they tend to have a certain…” I paused for a moment. I wasn’t sure it was polite to say TJ was a playboy before we came into each other’s lives, even if it was the truth. “I’m his first serious girlfriend since high school. But he’s the one who pushed me to make the appointment.”

“Why do you think he did that?”

I cringed. “Because I keep trying to break up with him.”

She sat up straighter. “Why’s that?”

I waved off her alarmed look. “Oh, nothing like that! I feel like a burden, and he doesn’t deserve to be with someone so broken.”

“Did he say that?”

“No.”

“Then why do you think that?”

I shrugged.

“Has he ever made you feel like you were a burden to him?”

Well, no. He made mistakes with me before we got together, but even then, he never made me feel like I didn’t deserve his love. That had all been my jerk brain, telling me I wasn’t worthy.

“No. He tries so hard to be a good boyfriend,” I explained.

“He sounds like he really cares about you.”

I nodded. “He does.”

“What sport does he play?” she asked.

“Hockey.”

She frowned. “Are you a big hockey fan? I don’t know anything about that.”

I nodded. “Diehard. I work for the team.”

“What’s that like?”

I spent the next few minutes explaining hockey to her and admitted that I loved working for the team but didn’t love my actual job. She pressed me on that, and I told her my worries about my boss being TJ’s sister, so I couldn’t tell him how I really felt about it. She asked me pointed questions about what I wanted to do instead, but I didn’t have an answer.

I realized when I looked at the clock and saw our time was almost up that she had been trying to get me to open up by asking about hockey and my job. She was trying to dig her way inside my brain so she could unlock the rest of my secrets later.

Rebecca peered up at the clock on her wall. “Listen, Maxine, that’s our time for today. But I think we have a lot of things we still need to discuss. I’d like to see you weekly if that works for you?”

I stood up and shook her hand. “Thank you for meeting with me today. I’m not…” I let out a shaky breath. “I’m not ready to talk about everything yet. It’s all too painful.”

“We’ll get there in time, but I’m glad you finally decided it was time to get help. There’s no shame in needing that. We can talk more about your career troubles later, too.”

I frowned.