Page 126 of Mommy

It’s a ridiculous trade. A bouquet of pretty flowers in exchange for her daughter?

I’m still thankful we brought them, and maybe if things go well, we can bring her a new bouquet next week? And the week after that? Maybe when I’m not here all the time, I can actually enjoy spending time with her. Maybe if it’s only once or twice a week, I can actually look past the fact that she sometimes calls me Ebony and I won’t be swallowed by that feeling of not being enough.

“Get your things, Ivy.” Derek murmurs into my loose hair, his hand softly nudging into the small of my back.

I do. I pack in record time and before I know it, Derek is bringing the bag to the car and I’m left alone with my Mom in the house I grew up in.

“Hey Mom?” I call towards the kitchen, but don’t wait for a response. “I’ll be staying at Dereks for a bit. But you have my number in your phone, if anything comes up. And I’ll be coming by next week, okay?”

She doesn’t reply, but I can hear her humming somewhere in the distance. That must be good enough.

She’s happy and I’ll see her next week. That’s good enough for me.

Chapter sixty three

Ivory

Derek insists on carrying my bag, leaving me with the key to open the door.

Once we’re alone and the dogs are all safely in their crates, I slump down on the couch. Derek joins me a moment later with two cups of steaming tea. Handing me one, he takes his place next to me.

I can see the apology in his eyes, it’s written somewhere in the green, following the curve of his blonde lashes and bleeding into his broad cheekbones.

There’s no need for him to say the words out loud, when I can read them so clear in his gaze.

My smile is still painting my face, when the question slips past my lips.

“Are we still up for the plan to catch the ring leader?”

Shock widens his eyes for a split second before he schools his features into a concentrated mask.

“Ezekiel talked it through with me.” His eyes are not meeting mine, and instead he stares into his cup while he goes on. “He wasn’t a fan of it either. Because of Posie. But he said, that⁠—”

I wait for him to look up before I nod, encouraging him to go on. Whatever it is Ezekiel said, I want to hear it. And I need to hear what conclusion they came to.

“—it was my call to make.”

Nodding, I take a long sip of tea. It’s delicious, I can taste chamomile and mint with a hint of apple.

At the end of the day, Posie belongs to Derek. She’s his dog, so naturally he gets to make the decisions involving her. That I care for her doesn’t hold a candle to the way he provides for her and the puppies. The mere fact that I just left them all for a week made clear how much she really doesn’t belong to me.

The thought hurts, an ache that eats its way into my stomach and sets fire to the bottom of my heart.

“When?”

Because there’s no doubt that Derek decided to do this. I got a glimpse of the guilt still trapped in the corner of his mouth that tells me everything I need to know.

“The offer has been up on Greg’s List for less than a day and someone contacted me this morning, confirming they’d take her. And the puppies. I’m pretty sure, it’s them. They said I could just leave her tied to a bench and they would pick her up.”

Yeah, that sounds like it’s them.

“They are paying a shitload of money. It’s no wonder the poor people went for the offer, believing their claims that the dogs would go and live a happy life with great families.”

And instead, they were sending them off to hell. To be bred, used and abused. Turned into monsters that would never escape their nightmares, trapped at the bottom of a food chain that never stopped being hungry for more.

“When is the drop off?”

Thinking about it now, I hope it’s not too far in the future because the more time I have to think this through, my mind will come up with more ways this could go terribly wrong.