Page 61 of Shattered Souls

“They’re sacrificing their happiness for peace among everyone.” He shrugs his shoulders, reclining on the couch and patting his thigh. A silent invitation for me to extend my feet. He’s learned in our strange time together, that I enjoy being touched—not greedy touches. The soft and delicate ones, the ones you do subconsciously. Those melt my heart.

“I’m tired of putting myself down so others can be happy.” I close my eyes, visions of my father flashing in my mind. The way he would break me until I obeyed every command. The way his hand would strike my cheek at the slightest hint of disobedience. “I deserve happiness.”

How many times do I have to tell myself that before it sticks to my skin? When do I let myself settle? Is this something I want? A life between two men that seem to adore me, mainly Hayze, or do I want to keep running every year?

I’m jolted awake from the rattling of a slammed door.

I blink the drowsiness from my eyes as I sit up. Hayze is resting by my feet, scrolling on his phone. I tug on the blanket he must’ve laid across us and gain his attention. His eyes are on me for a split second before we both look to the small hallway leading to the front door—more importantly, Synn and an all too happy looking Beth.

“Oh,” She regards the intimate and casual scene of me and the muzzled actor. “Didn’t think you’d be here.” Synn rolls his eyes and walks deeper into the house.

“Bethany needed some help.” He speaks to Hayze in sign language as he continues talking aloud to the room. “She says she thinks I might have something of hers. Says she left it at my station last weekend.” But his hands are saying something different.

“Nice to see you, Bethany.” Her name tastes like venom on my tongue.

“Oh, yes,” her brows scrunch together as if she’s thinking about something. “Was it Ruby?”

“Yep, good job.” She lets out a loud sigh and crosses her arms over her chest, not a fan of my lack of participation in her little dig at me. Hayze rubs my leg as I stare the spiteful blonde down.

“I’m going to go check my room for the—what did you say it was again?” Synn doesn’t hide his distaste this time. But, man, does she miss it. She perks up, and smiles sweetly at him.

“A pink beanie.”

“Yeah, sure.” He turns on his heel and makes his way down the hall. Beth winks at me, and quickly follows after him. I huff out an annoyed breath, jealously coating my skin.

Hayze chuckles, chest shaking and small bursts of noise coming from deep within his throat. I glare at him, though my cheeks and neck heat with embarrassment.

I shouldn’t like Synn. Sure, he looks just like Hayze, but these men are night and day. Yet, I find myself watching that big grump with heat coming in my belly and a strange pitter flooding my heart.

I’ve gotten used to it with Hayze—the sudden fluttering in my chest when he does small things for me. But, they’re not small to me, they’re everything.

“What are you laughing at?” I toss a throw pillow at his head, making him laugh harder. His eyes are bright and full of joy, a sight that makes me want to love him. Makes me want to allow that strange feeling to seep into my bones.

“You’re jealous.” He signs. The second my eyes understand his words, the color in my cheeks deepens tenfold.

“Am not.” God, I sound so childish right now. Defending myself against allegations that are nothing but true.

“You’re even cuter when you lie.” A middle finger thrown his way.

“I just don’t like Beth.” Not a lie. Not at all. She’s insufferable to be around—always needing to be the center of the conversation and the room. Not to mention, she needs the constant male validation to feel important. Hence the little performance.

“Well, she’s just jealous you have Synn when she wants him more than anything.” He lays an arm over the back of the couch, a pure sign of indifference.

“I do not have Synn.” More color to my cheeks, and now a heat pooling between my thighs.

“But you could.” His brows raise. A challenge?

“What does that mean?” I switch to signing, not wanting nosey ears to listen.

“That was the whole deal,” he winks at me, sending more heat to my core. “We could both have you. Spoil you and share you so you feel nothing but pleasure while with us.” My mouth drops open.

“So you’re telling me,” the words get caught for a moment, unsure if he’s just testing me.

“That you could go in there and assert your dominance over a man that’s been hungry for you for weeks? I would be encouraging it.” My body is on fire. Desire, confusion, and excitement swirling in my mind like a raging storm. The whole time, he’s just been waiting for me to want him?

Hayze nods towards the hallway, telling me to go. Slowly, I push off the couch, waiting for him to strike me—or worse. But instead, he smiles at me and sends me off with a tap to my ass.

The walk down the hallway is long and tense, my blood thrumming in my ears the whole time. His door is cracked, so I peek inside. Beth’s sitting on the bed, feet swaying over the edge, as Synn rummages through his drawers.